Give Me Wings
by Tovaras
Summary: Was in the Novella Challenge 2005, got no spesific place in the contest.


**Give Me Wings**

Author: Dragongirl85

Pairings: 1x2, hinted 3x4

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Sorry to say it, but I don't... If I did, Relena would be killed a long time ago and the Gundam Boys would be extremely happy (not because Relena was dead. Well, Heero would...) I'm making no money for writing this. Don't sue, you won't get much anyway, unless you want a cranky, old cat, a fucked up cell-phone and a really, really, REALLY old and crappy computer.

Raiting: M (language, violence)

Notes: Set about 2 years after EW. It started as a story about how Duo was created, a mix between the divine and the taboo, but it ended up as a story about how Heero and Duo found each other. I will still go for my original plot, minus every angel and demon that was supposed to be in the story, but it won't be as good as I'd hoped it would be. I just hope that you will find it acceptable and enjoyable to read.

Warnings: Fluff, a little angst, language, maybe some OOC.

Archive: Sure, but please ask first.

Beta: The wonderful Shenlong, the incredible Princess and my buddy Selene! Thank you for doing such a great job on beta'ing my fic! Hope it wasn't to boring for you. huggle

---

A.C. 180, Colony L2-Cluster:

The streets on L2 were dark and dirty; nobody cared for the safety of the few people that actually dared to live there. Everyday was a constant battle for children and drug-addicts, a constant battle for survival. The Alliance roamed the streets during the day, giving the working people safety to a certain degree, but at night, they retreated to their bases. It was then that the people of the underground showed up in the streets.

There was no doubt that even though the Alliance managed to keep them at bay during the day, the gangs of L2 ruled the streets.

The lights never worked in the darkest of the alleys in the more ruined parts of the city, leaving the corners black. But in one deserted alley, one of the few that still had a somewhat working light, a character appeared carefully from the dark.

It was a woman, clasping something covered in white clothing in her arms. Glancing from side to side, she scanned the area for any danger, but found none. Stepping into the light, she revealed a young, tired face and a mass of long, silky brown hair. Her eyes were red and swollen, and trails from old tears covered her thin cheeks.

Swallowing heavily, she choked back another sob as she bent down and placed the little bundle next to an empty box at the corner of the alley. Bringing her hands behind her neck, she unfastened the chain she was wearing and brought it to her lips. Kissing the golden cross attached to the chain, she sniffed and placed it on the little bundle.

"I'm sorry," she whispered and gently stroked her hand over the clothing before breaking into heavy sobbing. Straightening up, she covered her face with her hands and fled the scene. She couldn't say anything else, she just had to get away. Soon she was gone, vanished without a trace, as she had never existed.

Silence filled the alley and the little baby was all alone. Sensing the silence and coldness around him, the baby did the only thing he could do. He started crying. He was alone and scared. He just wanted to snuggle up against a warm body for some comfort. And his prayers were heard.

"Solo, this really so smart? Could be a trap, yanno!"

Three small characters emerged from the shadows and stared around the alley. The smallest of the three pulled on the biggest one's T-shirt and whined. "Solo, I'm scared! Can't we just go back home, huh?"

Solo looked down at the little boy next to him and shook his head. "Nuh-uh! I'm not leaving until I find out where that sound's comin' from! If it is a baby, we can't just leave it alone out 'ere! Yanno the rules, Mikey!"

Mikey looked at Solo and rubbed his arm."But Solo... What if it's a trap from one of the other gangs? Or what if it's the cops, huh? They use dirty tricks like that! Bonny said 'em did!"

Solo clamped his hand over Mikey's mouth and hissed. "Don't listen to what Bonny says! Bonny only says it to scare ya! And the cops don't use tricks like this and ya know it! The cops just come for ya and grab ya when they see ya!"

Mikey stared at the other boy, then started sniffing. "But Solo..."

"Can ya quit your yappin'? Check out what I found! It's a baby!" The third kid has used his time while the other two were arguing and had walked over to the bundle on the ground. He'd seen the golden cross shine in the light from the blinking lamp, intending to examine it so that they could sell it later and had found something a little more valuable under it. A little baby.

The baby had stopped crying as soon as he saw the boy appear over him and squealed instead while raising his arms towards the boy. The boy only smiled and picked the baby up after hooking the cross around the baby's neck. Stealing from people on the street and from stores was one thing, stealing from abandoned kids was something entirely different.

Solo ran over to the third kid and stared down at the baby. "Whoa... It really is a baby..."

The kid giggled and softly looked at the baby. "It's all alone. At least I think it is."

Solo gently lifted on the clothing surrounding the baby and grinned. "It's a 'he', Myles. The kid's a he. And he's wet himself too!"

"Ewww!" Holding the baby at arms length, Myles wrinkled his nose. Gross, dude! Totally gross!"

Solo laughed and took the baby from him, holding him protectively in his arms. "We can't leave 'im here... We hafta take him back with us."

Mikey stared at the bundle before shifting his gaze to Solo. "But he's just a baby, Solo... He can't do anything. He'll just cry and poo and piss and not be any use to us."

Solo glared at Mikey and said starkly. "What have I said about that attitude, Mikey? Nobody is useless!" Stroking his hand over the little hairless head, his voice softened and he smiled. "We'll raise him, make him a part of our gang." Grinning towards his two companions, he added. "He'll become something big! I can feel it! I bet he's gonna be the best thief on the entire colony!"

Myles rolled his eyes and started walking back into the shadows. "Sure... He'll be the one to spread terror, that one..."

---

"_I am... I am trapped... Can't break free..._

_Looking up... People passing me... Who are these people anyway? Can't... Remember..._

_They talk... Can't say anything... Remember the mission... Remember your mission... Leave me... Won't talk anyway... Never will... I can shut up. Just you watch me, I can shut up... Everybody says I talk too much, but I can shut up... Just... Just watch me..._

"_Fuck, another round of questions? Won't they ever learn? I won't talk, dammit... I won't... God, it hurts... Can hardly breathe... Can't they just leave me alone? Let me die in peace... _

_Let the... God of Death... Rest..._

_Damn..._

"_So... Cold... Cold... Can't see... Dark... Lonely..."_

'_Duo...'_

"_Duo."_

"_Duo!"_

_---_

"Duo!"

"Huh!"

After Colony 196. Christmas. Colony L4-cluster:

Blinking, Duo snapped out of the dreamlike state he'd been in and fixed his Cobalt blue eyes on the slightly worried blond before him. "Eh?"

Quatre stared at him and gently squeezed the American's arm. "Duo, are you okay? You looked so lost."

Duo chuckled and nodded. "Relax, Quat, I'm fine. I just dozed off for a little bit, that's all." Scratching the base of his neck, he asked. "What were you saying again? I wasn't payin' much attention."

Quatre chuckled and released Duo's arm. "At least you're being honest about it."

Duo chuckled and smiled. "Well, that's me. Duo Maxwell. He runs, he hides, but he never lies."

Quatre chuckled and put his hands on the railing in front of him while staring out at the city. The colony was one of space's finest, home to the heir of the Winner fortune and now the owner of Winner inc. Quatre Raberba Winner had finally come home.

Duo turned away from his blond friend and leaned against the railing while staring over the colony's walls. It was a nice colony, no arguments there, but it wasn't his style. The high-class life was something he could never get used to, no matter how much he tried. He was accustomed to the simple life; food on the table, a roof over his head and a warm bed to crawl into at night were more than enough to keep him satisfied. But of course, the small perks of life were welcomed with open arms as well. Turning his head to look at Quatre, Duo asked. "So, what were you sayin' again?"

Quatre smiled and closed his eyes, enjoying the soft breeze brought by the colony's weather system. "I was saying, that since the Eve War is over, the five off us should get together for a proper celebration. I reckon that everybody will go their separate ways soon, so it would be nice to have a true farewell." Biting his lip, Quatre's smile turned a little sad and he looked away. "I am, of course, hoping that we will be able to keep in touch after this as well. I know in my heart that the war brought us together for a reason. I hope that everybody will be able to come to the gathering. I was thinking that we could have one once a year or something."

Duo snorted and his eyes took a sad glimmer instead of the usual merry sparkle. "Everybody, huh? Don't get your hopes up too high, buddy."

Quatre looked at him, wondering why his braided friend suddenly looked so sad. "What do you mean, Duo?"

Hanging his head a little, Duo sighed. "Trowa and Wufei'll probably turn up, there's no doubt about that, but Heero... There's no way in hell that Heero will..."

Quatre gave him a confused look. "I don't understand... What do you mean? Of course Heero will come... Won't he?"

Duo shook his head and suddenly became very interested in his fingernails. "I'm sayin' that he won't come. As soon as the war ended, he followed Relena home and then left without a trace. At least that's what Relena says. I've tried to contact him through mail, but no luck... I... I guess he wants to forget about the war and everyone in it... Wouldn't surprise me..."

Quatre shook his head and gently squeezed Duo's arm. "That doesn't sound like Heero... He wouldn't just cut contact with everybody he knows, just like that... But it is odd that he didn't contact you after the war..."

Duo snorted. "Not that odd..."

Quatre frowned slightly. "Yes, it is. You were the one he opened up too."

Duo chuckled and a little smile ghosted over his lips, only to vanish as quickly as it came. "Relena was the one who came through in the end... I did all the hard work, being there when he was injured, being his friend, supporting him when he needed it, letting him yell at me when he was upset and lending him a shoulder when he needed it. But the second his shell begin to crack, she was there and snatched him away from me..." Sighing, Duo once again looked over the colony, studying the cars on the main road under the bridge he and Quatre were standing on. "I just... I just wanted to help and be with my best friend... I wanted to be the friend that he needed... But she took him away from me..."

Quatre looked at the braided American with sad eyes, understanding his pain and feeling it in his heart. "Duo..." Studying the sad face of the Deathscythe pilot, he stated. "You're in love with him, aren't you?"

Duo blushed to the roots of his hair and spluttered. "What in the Devil's name makes you say that!"

Quatre laughed softly, a little pleased with himself that he'd finally been able to confirm what he'd suspected for so long. "Well, one thing that gives you away is the way you talk about him. Always with admiration and a tender tone in your voice." Letting his smile soften, Quatre looked at Duo with kind eyes. "Another thing is that I can see it on your face... And sense it in your heart. I am very sensitive when it comes to emotions, you know..."

Duo remained stunned throughout Quatre's little speech, but as soon as the blond stopped talking, he snorted and let a smile grace his lips. "That damned space heart of yours, huh?"

Quatre smiled and nodded. "That's right, my friend."

Duo snorted again and smiled even wider. "Guess it's no use hiding it then... The war is over and I should stop hiding..." Turning away from Quatre, he once again gazed over the colony, but this time with a soft smile playing on his lips. "I guess I do love him..." Letting his smile turn into an evil grin, he grabbed the back of Quatre's head and ruffled the blond hair. "But if you tell anybody about this conversation, the God of Death will have to kill you."

Quatre winced and nodded. "Roger that."

---

_Life is a fragile thing... Once you have it, you can just as easily lose it..._

_You are born, you grow up, you die... Thus is the circle of life..._

_You live to eat, to love, to live in general..._

_Thus is your live..._

_You live..._

_Only to die..._

_From darkness to light and back to darkness..._

_But when does life start?_

_Yours start now... And so it begins..._

_Good luck..._

_---_

"Huh?"

A.C. 198. Shuttle to Colony L2-Cluster:

Rubbing his eyes, Duo blinked sleepily and looked around a very empty shuttle. He was the only passenger to L2, the others had gotten off when they landed on the moon just a few hours earlier. Letting out a loud yawn, he mumbled to himself. "Weird dream..."

Scratching the base of his neck, he tried to crack his stiff back. It wasn't a picnic to be stuck in the same shuttle, in the same seat, for over a day. Sitting in one position for hours really made his body stiff. Rubbing his eyes again, Duo started thinking about the dream. _'I've been having these dreams for so long now... What does it mean? Who is the_ _lady in my dreams? What is she talking about? Life? Just started?' _Shaking his head, he dismissed yet another one of his dreams as weird and then looked up as the captain announced that they would be docking on L2 in just a few minutes.

As soon as the shuttle docked, Duo unbuckled himself, ignoring the request to stay buckled up until the shuttle had come to a complete stop and got onto his feet to crack his back. He wanted out and he wanted out now.

Grabbing his bag from the locker over his head, Duo pulled his tired body towards the exit and out of the shuttle. He walked out of the arrival lounge and through the terminal, then he stopped and dropped his backpack on the ground so he could stretch his body to the fullest. He'd grown a few more inches in the past two years, but his body was still as lean and slim as it had always been. Granted, he'd been blessed with slightly broader shoulders and more muscular arms as well as stronger thighs, but he still looked like he was only sixteen. Rubbing his chin, he could feel the soft rasp of stubble there and decided that he first thing he would do when he got back home to the scrap yard, after going to the bathroom to take a leak that is, was to shave, take a shower and get his butt to bed. He wasn't really bothered with facial hair, he shaved less than most guys.

After popping out a few more kinks, he picked up his duffel bag again and once more made his way towards the exit. When he got outside, he was blessed with a soft breeze and a very familiar feminine voice. "Duo!"

Smiling broadly, he ran towards the woman coming his way. "Hilde!"

Feeling small arms around his neck, he dropped the bag so he could hug the daylights out of his "sister". He'd missed her while being on earth, so hearing her laugh again was a blessing to his ears. "God, Duo, I have missed you so much!"

Laughing, Duo let the smaller woman go and smiled. "Missed you too, sis!"

Looking up at her "brother", she smiled. "How did the contract go?"

Frowning, Duo let out a big yawn and bent over to grab the bag he'd dropped. "Please, Hilde, I just got back. Can't we discuss it tomorrow after I've had a good night's sleep?"

Hilde snickered and patted his shoulder. "Can't wait that long. Just tell me if we got the job or not."

Duo grinned and nodded. "We got the job, all right. As of next week, we will pick up scrap from one of the biggest factories on earth as well as the smaller factories on the moon. And our fee will be about twice as much as we calculated."

Hilde clapped. "That's more than we could have hoped for!"

Duo grinned and nodded, then let out another big yawn.

Hilde raised an eyebrow and smirked. "You tired?"

Duo let his own lips curve into a smirk. "Well, I've only been on that damned shuttle for over twenty four hours in one position, sleeping a grand total of one hour."

Hilde snorted and placed her hands on her hips. "Well, you can't be that tired. You're still awake enough to be sarcastic."

Duo snorted and grinned. "Can you blame me?"

Hilde laughed and wrapped an arm around Duo's shoulders, leading the tall man out of the airport and over to the parking lot. "Sarcastic or not, you've been missed. Welcome home."

Duo smiled and looked at her while walking. "So I've been missed?"

Hilde nodded and grinned. "Yup. The scrap yard's a mess, the pipes in the bathroom have sprung a leak and the only available plumber refuses to come and fix it because you threatened to castrate him the last time he was over. Oh, and the colony's weather system is having problems so expect a storm somewhere in the next few days."

Duo winced and stared at the gathering clouds in the distance. "Welcome home, my ass... And it was the plumbers fault! He tried to double the price we agreed on!"

Hilde rolled her eyes and led Duo over to their pickup. "Duo... The damage was worse than he expected... The entire hot water tank was about to blow and the pipes around it were rusted through."

Duo snorted and threw his bag onto the back seat. "He said a price, you stick with it. That's what we do, even if we find out that we've been a little too generous with the price. We've said it, we stick with it."

Hilde rolled her eyes again and climbed into the driver's seat. "Whatever. The point is that I want you to say you're sorry, crawl on your knees and kiss his ass if you have to, and make him come and fix the bathroom! We've got an indoor pool in there!"

Duo grinned and climbed into the passenger seat, buckled up and made himself comfortable. "Hah! Something I can brag about to Quatre at the next pilot gathering party."

Hilde raised an eyebrow while buckling up and inserted the key into the ignition. "What? That we have a pool in our bathroom?"

Duo nodded. Hilde smirked and started the car. "Doesn't he have one? Could have sworn he did..."

Duo shook his head and held up his hand while counting Quatre's many houses on his fingers. "Nah, don't think he has one. He has a house in Arabia with a pool in the garden, has one house on L4 with a pool in the garden and one indoors, got one mansion in Beijing with a pool indoor, at least I think it was in Beijing, and got one in London with a..." Duo stopped and let his jaw fall. "... Pool in a huge bathroom... Aw, man!"

Hilde laughed and glanced over at the braided man while stopping for a red light. "Come on, Duo, you were actually hoping that you had something Quatre didn't? And our bathroom isn't a pool, it's just flooded."

Duo pouted and crossed his arms while leaning back into the seat. "I could make it into a pool."

Hilde snorted. "Duo, we're not having a pool indoors, especially not in the bathroom. We don't have the space for it."

Duo continued to pout until his bluff was called by a big yawn. Hilde smiled tenderly. "Sleep a little, Duo. We have a good hour's drive before we reach home. I'll even stop and pick up some take-out. How does Japanese sound?"

Duo nodded and closed his eyes. "Thanks, Hilde... and Japanese sounds just fine..." Smiling a little, he started thinking about a certain Japanese he hadn't seen or heard from in two years. _'Heero,'_ he thought sadly before drifting into sleep. _'Where are you? What are you doing now? Do you miss us at all? Do you... miss me?'_

---

Staring out the window as lightning flared over the scientifically created sky, Duo sighed and tossed his pen away, watching it as it hit the desk and rolled down onto the floor. The weather had been awful for the seven days he'd been home and he was pretty much stuck inside, doing paperwork. He and Hilde had tried to start some of the contracts they were under, getting a few truckloads of junk into their yard, but they could only last for so long in the biting cold and the pouring rain before they had to get inside. The telephone lines went on and off all the time, but they had managed to contact all their employees and managed to alter time scheduling in their contracts because of the storms. They were stuck where they were.

Looking up as a dripping wet Hilde emerged in their living room, Duo smirked. "Told ya it was a bad idea to go outside."

Hilde glared and tossed her sopping wet raincoat into their still flooded bathroom. Duo had, after a little argument with Hilde, called the plumber and begged for forgiveness; but because of the weather, the plumber couldn't make it anyway. So Duo had applied his mechanical knowledge to plumbing, tried his best to fix the leaking pipe and ended up with a satisfying result. They could now take a shower again, but if they stayed in there for long, the pipe would burst and they would be back to square one. Duo had discovered that after spending a little too much time with his hair.

Duo chuckled again and went back to his paperwork. He could tell that the woman was pissed; a combination of the weather and because she was stuck indoors with not much to do. She hated paperwork so Duo, who was not very fond of it himself, was stuck doing most of it. He didn't understand why he had to do it, but Hilde had pointed out that it was good for him. Duo had only snorted and said that he couldn't do it if he didn't understand it, but much to his surprise, he found it very easy to do. "The radio just reported that the weather system should be fixed sometime tomorrow so we should be able to get out and do some work by Friday."

Hilde nodded and started up the coffee maker so she could have a cup of much needed coffee. "About time. I'm sick and tired of being indoors and I'm sick and tired of checking if the damn tent is secured!"

Duo chuckled and pointed out. "But you get such lovely rose-colored cheeks from it."

Hilde just made a face and poured herself a cup of coffee. "Shove it, Duo."

Duo snickered and finished the last of his calculations after getting up and fetching his pen from the floor. "Oh, so cranky... Maybe you should get out more?"

Hilde pulled a face and took a big sip of her coffee. "That was lame, even for you."

Duo shrugged and tidied up the papers from the floor. "What can I say? This weather is getting to me too."

Hilde shrugged as well and looked out the window. "Well, they say that all good comes to those who wait. Maybe we'll get a big, fat bonus from that scrap dealer when we're done with his contract?"

Duo snorted and filed the papers away in a filing cabinet. "Or maybe two hot men, one for each of us, will come floating by on a raft and stop right outside our door, waiting to shower us with their love and undivided attention?"

Hilde laughed and downed the last of the hot liquid before placing the cup into the dishwasher. "Or maybe a certain Japanese Gundam pilot will make a sound and let us know he's still alive?"

Duo snorted and got up to grab a cup of his own. "Now, that's just being cruel, Hilde."

Hilde smiled and patted Duo's back as he passed her. "All good comes to those who wait, Duo."

Duo snorted again and stared out the window. "Well... I'm waiting all right..."

---

Duo winced as lightning flared over the night sky and curled up in his bed. He hated lightning. He wasn't scared, he just didn't like the depressing mood it set. Picking some lint off of his pillow, he gave up any further thoughts of sleep for the moment and just stared into the air, thoughts swirling around in his head.

'_Two years... Two years and my feelings for him_ _haven't_ _changed one, fucking bit! I'm_ _pathetic...'_ Groaning, he rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling. He'd been alone and lost people he loved all his life, but Heero still lingered in his heart. He simply couldn't forget him. _'Heero... Where are you? Why won't you let us know you anymore? Why did you leave?'_

Tossing again, Duo squirmed onto his side and started picking invisible lint from the pillow again, just to take his mind off of Heero. The wind outside picked up another notch and Duo could just imagine that the roof of the house would be torn off at any moment.

After checking the time and finding out it was almost four in the morning, he curled up in bed and closed his eyes. He tried to sleep, tried his best to knock all the disturbing thoughts out of his head. He didn't want to dream about Heero again, he didn't want to dream at all. He just wanted to sleep. And he was almost successful.

A series of knocks pounded on the front door.

Raising his head, Duo stared into the darkness of his room. "What the-?" It had to be a dream; nobody would be crazy enough to be out in this kind of weather, let alone at this hour. After listening for a minute or so and being met by silence, Duo shook his head and lowered it onto the pillow. "Must 'ave been my imagination," he mumbled as he tucked the quilt closer to his body. He closed his eyes, felt the familiar sensation of sleep fill his head...

Someone rapped on the front door again.

"Oh, for the love of God!" Duo snarled and angrily threw the quilt onto the floor. Taking quick steps towards his bedroom door, he yanked it open so hard that it hit the wall with a loud bang. Ignoring the noise he was making, he marched towards the front door, unlocked it and yanked it open. Glaring on the dripping wet person outside, he snarled. "You got some fucking nerve coming here in the middle of the night and just-!" Blinking, Duo ended his rant and simply stared.

Hilde rubbed her eyes sleepily as she exited her bedroom and walked towards Duo. "Duo, why the hell are you making all that noise? Some of us are trying to sleep here." Getting no reply from her braided friend, she frowned and poked his shoulder. "Duo, what are you doing? Don't just stand there, answer me and-!" Stopping her own rant, she followed Duo's eyes until they landed on the person outside their door. "Oh, my god..."

Heero simply stared back; no expression was readable on his face. Trails of water were running down a slightly red face and his clothes were soaked through, but he didn't care. He wasn't cold.

Duo shook his head and closed his mouth before choking out a faint "He... Heero?"

Heero's lips moved slightly upwards in a tiny smile before it disappeared. "Long time no see, Duo. May I come in, or is this a bad time? I wanted to make sure that I came here at a time when I was sure you would be home."

Duo didn't know what surprised him the most; the fact that Heero Yuy was standing on his front porch or the fact that he'd just talked more to him now that he had during the two wars together. Duo, for the first time in his life, was speechless. Hilde, on the other hand, had more to say.

"No, no, Heero. It's fine. We don't mind." Pushing Duo out of the way, she let the soaked teen inside. "Come on in and I'll get you a towel and something warm to drink."

Duo snapped out of his shock and nodded. "Y-yeah. I'll go and make some coffee and see if I have something you can borrow that's dry to wear."

Heero nodded and once again gave a faint smile. "Much appreciated, Duo..."

Duo nodded and disappeared to find his long lost friend something to wear.

---

"So, where have you been for the last two years? We've looked everywhere for you." Duo placed a cup of coffee in front of Heero and sat down on the couch next to the Japanese teen. Hilde had left them a while ago to go back to bed.

Heero looked up from towelling his hair and stared at Duo. "We?"

Duo nodded eagerly and studied his friend's face. Heero was still pretty much the same, his hair was the same mess it always had been, his eyes just as intense blue as they had been the last time he'd gazed into them. He'd grown though and was a little taller than the American and his shoulders were much broader, but his body was still lean and rippled with muscles. At least that's what the little peek Duo'd stolen at Heero had revealed. Now Heero was covered in a big, black T-shirt, green sweatpants and slippers. "Yeah, we. Quatre's spent a lot of time and resources on finding you and I've been going out of my mind with my own search for you."

Heero placed the towel around his neck before taking the cup on the table. Taking a sip, he stared thoughtfully at the table, not saying a word. Minutes passed in complete silence before the Japanese teen opened his mouth. "I've been... Around..."

Duo looked at him and took a sip from his own coffee cup. "Doing?"

Heero shrugged and took another sip. "Working... Getting around... Trying to find myself..."

Duo smiled carefully. "Did you find yourself?"

Heero chuckled and gave a little smile. "I don't know... But I feel more human now that I did right after the war."

Duo smiled and gave Heero's shoulder a little nudge. "Why don't you tell your story from the start, huh?"

Heero smiled. "It's a long story."

Duo chuckled and winked. "I've got all night. Sleep's for wimps."

Heero laughed and put the cup down onto the table. Pulling his legs onto the couch, he sat Indian-style in front of Duo, with his hands on his knees, eyes fixed on Duo's. "All right... I'll tell you."

Duo nodded and made himself comfortable on the couch, his eyes never breaking contact with Heero's.

Heero took a deep breath and began his tale. "I've... I've been travelling for two years now, staying at different locations on both the Earth and colonies, but I never stayed long. I never found a place to settle..." Clearing his throat, he looked down at his hands, breaking eye contact with Duo. "After the war, I didn't quite know where to turn. Relena offered me a job and a place to stay while I... while I was at the hospital after Wing disintegrated, and I was thinking about accepting it. It meant that I would be close to somebody I trusted and that I knew would need me, but... I turned her down. She was disappointed, of course, but didn't push it any further." Looking back up, Heero stared at Duo's face, but not into his eyes. "I wanted to tell you... All of you when I left, but... I needed some time alone... I'd just survived two wars; wars I wasn't supposed to live through, and now that peace reigned..." Sighing, Heero shifted a little on the couch and hung one leg over the side of the couch while resting his arm against the back of it. "Wufei's words haunted me... That when peace and pacifism were achieved, soldiers would be discarded like worn out puppets. We would be of no use to the world. I left the earth and started on L1, doing my best to get by while working in a mechanical shop there. But I couldn't settle down and after a few weeks, I left." Biting his lip, Heero looked down again and sighed. "I skipped L2 on purpose because I... I wasn't ready to meet you there... I didn't know if you would be there, but I didn't take any chances. I skipped colony L3, L4 and L5 as well because I didn't want to meet the others. I knew you would have questions for me; questions I wasn't ready to answer. So I kept on travelling, trying my best to get by, taking odd jobs to survive."

Duo raised an eyebrow and took a sip from his forgotten coffee. Wrinkling his nose when he found out that it had turned cold, he put the mug down onto the table next to Heero's before fixing his attention back on Heero. "Odd jobs?"

Heero smirked and looked up. "Yes, odd jobs. Working in repair shops, taking on small jobs from people needing help."

Duo smirked. "Like?"

Heero snorted and looked at the wall. "Fixing people's cars, roofs, helping them at home in return for room and board."

"Ah." Duo nodded and sat back onto the couch. He hadn't realized that he'd been tensing up during Heero's tale. "Go on."

Heero nodded and cleared his throat. "There really isn't much more to say, but... As time passed, I found out that I was useful still... My battle skills weren't needed but I had other skills I could use in order to survive and still be satisfied with my life and I..." Feeling a faint blush cover his cheek, he mumbled. "I felt a certain longing in my heart..."

Duo chuckled and grinned. "Longing, huh? What stirred those feelings?"

Heero frowned a little, but didn't say anything about his friend's teasing ways. "I saw you on the news and in the papers... Quatre's success in his family's business, Wufei's triumphs within the Preventers..." Smirking slightly, Heero looked at Duo. "Your success within the salvaging business... And the more I saw you guys, the more I realized that... that I missed the company you used to provide..."

Duo grinned and fluttered his lashes at Heero. "Awww... So you missed us?"

Heero shook his head and fixed his eyes on Duo. "No... I missed you..."

Duo's eyes widened slightly and he pointed at himself. "Me?"

Heero nodded and looked at him more intensely than before. "Yes, you." Seeing that his braided friend had been taken completely off-guard, Heero chuckled and looked away. "As much as I hate admitting it, I missed the company you gave me during the two wars. You were the only one I truly trusted and called my friend. I didn't dare to do that with the others because I didn't know if they would be capable of watching my back, but with you... I had no doubt that I could trust you with my life."

Duo gaped and blushed. "Well, I'm... Flattered that you think so highly about me. Thank you."

Heero just smirked and gave him a teasing look. Swallowing, Duo got up and picked up the two mugs. As he strolled into the kitchen, he asked. "So... What are you going to do now? Continue to travel and find yourself?"

Heero looked at Duo's back as the American bent down to put the empty mugs into the dishwasher. "I don't know. If you don't mind I would like to stay for a few days before I move on. I won't be a burden."

Duo chuckled and straightened back up. "Hey, I don't mind. Stay as long as you want, I don't mind the slightest. I've missed you too, you know." Whirling around, Duo placed a hand on his hip while pointing the other at Heero. "Hey, yanno what?"

Heero blinked and asked carefully. "What?"

Duo grinned and rushed back to the couch. "You can work here!"

Heero blinked again and looked at the braided teen. "... What?"

Duo grinned and pinched Heero's cheek. "You heard me. You can work here and help me and Hilde with the scrap yard. God knows we need a pair of strong and skilled hands around here to help us. You'll get paid, of course, and you'll get free room and board since you know the management." Winking, Duo flopped down onto the couch again and stared at Heero. "It's not exciting and the payment is crappy, but at least you'll be doing something and..." Blushing slightly, Duo grasped the end of his braid and started fiddling with it. "And I would get to spend some time with you... I've really missed you, you know and... If you just left now I'd..." Shrugging, Duo tried to keep his emotions in check. "I'll miss you even more... I didn't call you my best friend for nothing, yanno."

Heero stared at him for a moment before his face broke into a small, but beautiful smile. "You are being serious..."

Duo frowned and nodded. "Of course I'm being serious, you ass! Why would I offer if I wasn't?"

Heero just shook his head and placed a finger over Duo's lips. "Alright..."

Duo frowned and removed Heero's hand from his face. "Alright what?"

Heero smirked. "I accept your offer."

Duo's frown eased up and was replaced with a big, beautiful smile. "Really? You mean it?" Heero nodded and was about to say something, but never got the chance to as Duo embraced him in a huge bear-hug. "Heero, this'll be great! I'll fix you up a contract and payment and all the paperwork tomorrow and you can crash here for the night! Heck, we have a spare room you can have and you're more than welcome to stay!"

Heero gently patted Duo's back while hugging his over enthusiastic friend. "Shouldn't you ask Hilde about it too? I mean, I don't want to force myself into your personal life."

Duo shook his head and grinned. "Don't you worry about it, she won't mind. And you won't disturb anything, I don't have a personal life anyway, I've been single since forever."

Heero raised an eyebrow and pulled back a little as soon as Duo released him from the hug. "I thought you two were dating."

Duo stared at him for a moment before he started laughing. "Me and Hilde? No way, dude! She's like a sister to me, there's no way we could date each other." Winking a little, he added. "She's not my type, besides, she's already seeing some bloke on L2. She normally stays with him, but he was going away this weekend."

Heero nodded. "I see... So you... You're not attached to anybody?"

Duo chuckled and shook his head. "Nope. Free as a bird."

Heero smirked and shook his head. "Well... I suppose I should thank you for your kindness..."

Duo just shook his head and stuck out his hand, the grin still plastered on his face. "Welcome to the scrap yard, Heero."

---

"Do you believe in angels, Heero?"

"Huh?" Heero gave Duo a quizzical look, once again wondering what was going on in the braided man's head.

It had been almost two months since Heero had accepted Duo's offer and started working at the scrap yard. Duo had been walking around, worrying if Heero would pack up and leave soon, but the Japanese had stayed put, not once hinting that he wanted to move on or not. In fact, it looked like Heero had come to stay.

Heero and Duo had picked up their friendship where they had left it two years ago and had spent many evenings out together, going to a movie, playing basketball or simply getting to know each other again. Slowly, but steadily they started to become closer, giving each other the trust and respect they deserved. And Duo's own feelings for Heero only grew stronger. It had happened so quickly, but after they had started spending more time together, it was like Heero had opened a door and was showing his true self. He was still pretty quiet and serious, but he was smiling more often than before and he was developing a sense of humour that complemented Duo's own.

They also talked together more, telling each other exactly what was on their minds at that moment. They spent many quiet nights in each other's company, mostly outside in the small backyard that Duo proudly called his garden. No flowers were living there, but soft, green grass covered the area.

"Could you repeat that, Duo?"

Duo chuckled and looked up at the moon. He never liked the moon when he was on the colonies; it was too close. It looked too much like a graveyard. "Do you believe in angels?"

Heero pulled his knees up to his chest and rested his chin on them. "No."

Duo raised an eyebrow. "No?"

Heero kept his gaze fixed on a star. "You heard me. I don't believe in angels. I don't believe in ghosts, ghouls, Big Foot or the Loch Ness monster either, just for the record."

Duo snorted and looked at his Japanese friend. "Why not?"

Heero snorted. "Because they don't exist, that's why."

"How do you know?"

"I've never seen any of those figures, and neither has anybody else."

Duo chuckled and leaned back against the house wall. "Nah, that ain't true. People used to see them all the time pre-colony 2000. And there is more between heaven and earth than reaches the eye, yanno."

Heero snorted and looked at Duo. "Really now. Have you ever seen a ghost or an angel?"

Duo shook his head, still smiling softly. "No."

Heero titled his head, raising his eyebrow. "Then why do you believe in it?"

Duo turned his head and closed his eyes in an entertained matter. "Because I do. I've just chosen to believe in that kind of stuff."

Heero grunted and looked away from his braided companion. "I believe in what I can see and touch. If I can feel it, then it's real."

Duo grinned. "You can't touch a ghost. So if you meet one, you'll just brush it off?"

Heero frowned and placed his hands on the ground. "I would prove that it's a fake."

Duo chuckled and looked up towards the sky again. Even though the moon was too close, the stars were still lovely to view. "You have got to learn to open up your mind, man. I've never seen a ghost, but it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. I mean, I've never seen France, but I'm pretty sure that's there on earth somewhere. Unless someone removed it from the map, that is."

Heero just snorted and lowered his legs to the ground. This conversation was just too... supernatural for his taste.

They sat like that for a while, in complete silence, the only thing disturbing them was the occasional hum of a car in the distance.

"Heero?"

Heero looked over to the braided American, but Duo didn't look at him. His eyes were still fixed on the night sky. "Yes?"

Duo's lips turned from a bright smile to a more serious one. "Do you regret the war?"

Heero blinked and looked away. Did he regret the war? He wasn't sure. The war itself had been horrible, all of the massacres, all the lost hopes and dreams. But it had entwined him with some of the best friends he'd ever had. The war had let him meet Relena so he could make up for his past mistake, so he could give up his nightmares about the little girl and her dog.

His first mission...

His first fuck up.

Relena had been his chance to make up for the lost life of the little girl; she gave him a chance to forgive himself for it. He'd stayed with her as long as she had needed him, but the second Heero knew she would be fine on her own, he left, despite the protest that came from the Princess of Peace. Relena was a sweet girl... But depended too much on Heero's strength, believing that she could do nothing on her own. By leaving, Heero wanted to prove that she was able to do things on her own; she didn't need him by her side forever. He knew that she would never let him go from her heart, but she had the decency to set him free. Free so he could find the humanity in him that he had lost so many years ago.

Regrettable as the war had been, it had also given him the greatest mystery in his life, the one that fascinated him more that he wanted to admit.

The war... had led him to Duo.

"Well?"

Heero looked back at Duo and stared. "Yes and no."

Duo nodded, but didn't ask about Heero's reason for saying that. "I don't regret it."

"Huh?"

Duo smiled and continued to stare towards the sky. "I don't regret the war."

Heero stared at him, confusion visible in his eyes. "Why not?"

Duo chuckled and closed his eyes. "Sure, the killing and destruction was horrible. Not a day goes by without me feeling sorry for those who lost their lives, feeling sorry for those who lost something precious, but... Even though I lost my fair share of people I loved, I don't regret it."

Heero didn't say anything, not right away. There was something in Duo's voice he couldn't quite place. It sounded like... longing. But he wasn't sure. He knew the basics of Duo's tale, Duo had shared his past with Heero on one occasion when they'd been out for dinner together. It was also the night he'd opened his heart, even though Duo didn't know it. He could still remember it so clearly.

_Flashback_

Duo smiled as he sat down at the table and took in the atmosphere of the restaurant. It wasn't too posh, yet classy combined with a sensation of home. It was a place where friends, couples and families could enjoy a nice dinner together as well as each others company. Duo had wanted to go to this place many times, but had never found the right occasion. But after Heero came waltzing back into his life, he'd grabbed the first chance he got.

Smiling as Heero handed him a menu, he opened it to see if he could find something that seemed tempting. Heero opened his own menu and studied it in silence.

The two men didn't say anything until a waiter came over and asked if he could take their order. Duo nodded eagerly and pointed at a dish. "I would like the steak, please. Make it juicy and with mashed potatoes instead of baked with lots of gravy."

"Vegetables?"

Duo winked. "Of course."

Heero just snorted and looked away from Duo and the waiter. He didn't know why, but he didn't like it when Duo flirted with the waiter. It ticked him off and he just wanted to get up and snap the waiters neck. "I'll have the salmon," he mumbled after a while and handed the menu over to the waiter without looking at him.

The waiter nodded and scribbled the orders down before taking the menus offered to him. "Anything to drink?"

Duo nodded and smiled. "Coke to begin with, a beer for dessert."

Heero smirked and looked at the braided man across of him. "Given up on chocolate milkshakes?"

Duo stuck out his tongue at Heero and gave a smirk of his own. "No, but not tonight. I Feel like a beer today."

Heero nodded and looked at the waiter with a slightly sour look. "The same for me."

The waiter nodded again and bowed slightly to them before leaving the table to get their orders. Duo leaned back onto his chair and stretched his arms over his head. "Man, I so needed a night out to relax!"

Heero nodded and cracked his neck. "Yeah. Those last shipments were pretty tough. We barely managed to fill up that contract you had on L16-BG."

Duo nodded and smiled. "Yeah, but we did it. Good thing you came knocking on our door when you did or Hilde and I never would have finished that deal. You truly are a knight in shining armour, come to rescue people when they need you."

Heero chuckled and raised an eyebrow. "And who is the poor damsel in distress? Hilde?"

Duo snorted and grinned. "Rather her than me. At least she looks good in a dress."

Heero cleared his throat and looked away. "I'm not even gonna ask..."

Duo just grinned. "Costume-ball."

Heero sighed. "I didn't ask."

The waiter arrived and gave the two men their drinks before he walked away again, leaving the two ex-pilots alone to enjoy each other's company. Duo sipped his coke and let the grin turn to a smile. "But seriously, I can't thank you enough for helping us. Without you, we would be going downhill now."

Heero smiled and took a sip from his glass. "I did tell you I would be there when you needed me..."

Duo raised an eyebrow and put the glass down on the table. "Can't remember when you've said that to me."

Heero bit his lip and made a little noise in the back of his throat, feeling the faint tingling of a blush crawling over his cheeks. "I... I said it to you... Before I left after the second war... We shared a room at that hotel and... You were asleep... I had to leave, but I... I didn't want to wake you. I felt it was better that way. I didn't want a long goodbye and I knew you would insist on either following me or making me tell you where I was going, but... I whispered it to you when you slept... Then I left."

Duo stared at Heero with his mouth slightly open. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Heero had actually done that? Granted, he'd been asleep when Heero had done so, but he still thought it was a sweet thing to do. He had promised to come back to him. _'Then maybe...'_ Shaking his head, Duo closed his mouth and smiled. "That was... very nice of you, Heero. But you could have woken me. If you'd explained your reasons, I would have left you alone. It... It hurt when you just left, no note or any messages. I thought..." Swallowing, Duo looked down into the glass. I thought you just wanted to forget everything... Forget... Me..."

Feeling a hand under his chin, Duo could feel his head getting pushed up until Cobalt blue met Prussian blue. "I could never forget you..." his voice breathed softly. "Not even if I wanted too..."

Feeling his cheeks flame up, Duo watched as Heero's hand drivted away and the waiter returned with their meal. They ate in comfortable companionship, chit-chatting about the latest salvaging-deal, the new weather system, how Relena was doing now that she was on top of the world and the next pilot gathering.

Once the meal was finished, the waiter removed the dirty dishes and brought the pair their beers and their bill. Duo took a sip from the bottle and smiled. "Well, we've talked about the standard stuff; the news, the weather, and we've gotten back on track with each other, but we still don't know each other, yanno. So why don't we share a little, eh?"

Heero raised an eyebrow and took a swing of his own beer. "What do you mean?"

Duo chuckled and shrugged. "Let's pretend this is a date. I tell you stuff about myself and you tell me stuff about yourself." Heero still looked like he didn't follow Duo's trail of thought, making Duo sigh and give a little, weak smile. "Obviously you've never dated, huh?"

Heero smirked. "What gave me away?"

Duo shook his head and gave his friend a bright smile. "Alright, then I'll go first. You just copy my lead." Heero nodded and Duo cleared his throat. "My name is Duo Maxwell, friends just call me Duo or Baka, depends on who you are. I run and hide but I never tell a lie. I'm about 18 now; not sure when I was born, but I've chosen to have a autumn birthday since I love autumn. As you might guess, my day is the thirty-first of October. I'm male, as you can see, and if you try to imply something else, I'll break both of your legs.

"I'm bisexual, dated both male and females, but have discovered that I've dated more men than women lately." That had been the scary part, but when Duo didn't get so much as a frown or a look of disgust from his Japanese friend, he continued. "I like to hang out in town with my friends, don't mind clubbing every once in a while, love to dance and have a good time, but I'm very careful with alcohol." Winking to Heero, he added, "I never drink without anybody I trust near me to watch my back, and even then I'm pretty careful."

Taking a little swing from his bottle, Duo took a short break before continuing. "But I also like quiet evenings at home, either with a good movie or a book, I like animals and want a cat, I like a good joke or a surprise. I treasure my friends and try to please everybody as much as I can. I'm messy, but try to pull myself together and clean up whenever I can. I'm also moody at times and try my best not to snap when I'm stressed, but I can get cuddly when I need comfort. On the other hand, I hate uptight people, snobs, plumbers, spiders, thunder, crumbs in the bed and the colour pink. I don't have a full education, but I've considered going to college at a later date after I've passed junior high and high-school over the Internet." Finishing the little introduction, Duo took a fresh swing from the beer and looked at Heero. "Your turn."

Heero nodded. "My name is Heero Yuy, my friends call me Heero. One person calls me Hee-chan, or 'Ro for short, but only he is allowed to. I am about 18, and I don't know when I was born, but I have yet to choose a birthday, but if I had to pick one, I would choose the eighth of April. But I'm going to keep the reasons to myself for now. I'm male, sexual preferences are still unknown to me as I have never felt a strong attraction to either sex."

Pausing a little to think, Heero trailed his finger up and down the side of the bottle, not noticing the trace of hurt in Duo's face. "I like... Quiet evenings with a book or a movie as well, and I like to run on the weekends and workout every chance I get. I don't drink much, and I never drink anything I haven't picked up or opened up myself." Lifting the bottle, he smirked. "Like this bottle. If the waiter had opened it for me, I wouldn't have touched it."

Taking a little swig, Heero put it down and continued. "I like my friends, they are the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I have one best friend. I like dogs and cats, but I am not sure if I want a pet. I don't like to be alone anymore or hurt people, nor do I like snobs. I am stoic and don't have a sense of humor, I hate messes and am called a neat-freak. I have some education; I finished junior high and high school on my travels and I am thinking about going to college when I find out what I want to do with my life." Looking down, he quietly added. "I am also afraid of dying."

Duo looked at Heero, softness shining in his eyes. He'd been listening intently to what Heero had been saying, hoping to catch a hint of how the stoic teen felt about him. He was pretty sure that he was the best friend Heero had been talking about and was pleased with that. But the little thing Heero had just said had made him wonder. Heero Yuy, the perfect soldier and a guy that tried to self-destruct or kill himself for the mission more times that he had fingers on his hands, was afraid of dying? "Heero..."

Heero looked up again and shoved the half-empty bottle of beer away from him. "I... I want to live..." Sighing, he quietly continued. "When the war ended, I... I felt useless and I wanted to die just to get away from it all. But when I saw how all of you had something to fall back on I decided to give myself a chance. I tried to move on, and in a strange way I managed to cope with the world, but... After I came here... And moved in with you... And found a friend again... I don't want to lose it. I don't want to die."

Duo listened, amazed at just how much Heero had opened for him now, just how much of his heart Heero was spilling. And he didn't want to disappoint him, he wanted to be the friend Heero wanted and needed. Giving him a bright smile, Duo gently placed his hand over Heero's and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Then live... You're welcome here with me as long as you need it and this is a friendship you'll never lose." Winking, Duo added as he removed his hand from Heero's. "Always best friends, Hee-chan. Whenever you need me, just call. I'll be there."

That sentence earned Duo the most beautiful smile he'd ever seen on Heero's face. It was like all the traces of the perfect soldier had vanished from his face for a second, leaving only gratefulness and happiness there and something else. But before Duo could put his finger on what that emotion was, the smile turned into a smirk and the old face was back. "Call whenever I need you, huh? Well, that shouldn't be a problem, you live straight across the hall from me."

Duo stuck out his tongue and tossed a curled up napkin at Heero who easily dodged it. "You know what I mean, 'Ro!"

Heero smirked again and nodded. "I do. Thank you, Duo... For saying that..."

Duo smiled and winked before drinking the last of his beer. "Don't mention it, Heero. Shall we head home or see if there's any good movies on at the local Cineplex?"

Heero got up and pulled out his wallet. "Let's just pay and head home. We have work tomorrow."

Duo smiled and placed his hand over Heero's as he pulled out a few bills. "Save it, Heero. This night's on me."

Heero gave Duo a quizzical look. "You sure? I can pay for myself, I don't mind."

Duo winked and nodded while smiling brightly. "I'm good for it, Heero. You can treat me to a night out later or something."

Heero nodded and smirked. "As you wish."

Picking up the bill, Duo went to pay while Heero walked outside to get some fresh air. When Duo came out, they slowly started to walk home. They didn't say anything, just enjoyed each other's company and tried to ignore car horns and shouting people. In the distance a police siren wailed. Duo smiled sheepishly and sighed. "Not the best colony, I know, but I grew up here... and this is the safest part of it."

Heero blinked and looked at the American whilst walking. "You... Never told me that you were from here."

Duo shrugged. "Not exactly the brightest chapter from the book that's my life."

Heero gave him a soft look; not of pity, but of understanding. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Duo gave Heero a quizzical look and raised an eyebrow. "Since when did you become so interested in the story of my life?"

Heero smirked and shrugged. "Ever since I knew you...?"

Duo could feel his eye twitch a little, then he smiled and nodded towards a park nearby. "Let's go to a more private spot."

They walked into the park, ignoring the drunks that were staggering past them, the whores that were making moves on them and promising them a good time at a cheap price and a drug-addict asking for cash to get high. Finding a more secure location, they located a bench that they could sit on without the risk of getting any unknown substances on themselves and made themselves comfortable.

Stretching his arms high in the air, Duo popped his neck and sighed. "You sure you wanna hear it?"

Heero raised an eyebrow and nodded towards a man in a miniskirt that was trying to catch their attention. "I followed you in here, Duo, your so called private spot. Yes, I am sure I want to hear it."

Duo chuckled and smiled sheepishly. "Well, there's a lot of people here, but they're either so drunk or high that they don't care about you. It doesn't look good, but it's perfectly safe here. I've spent many nights in this park, both in my past and in the latter days, and if you think it's bad now, you should have seen it seven years ago."

Heero shuddered and shoved his hands into the pockets of his jacket. "I think I'll pass... But go ahead. I'm all ears."

Duo nodded and started his tale. "Well, there isn't much to it. I was born on this colony, or at least I think I was. I don't really remember. I was left, abandoned by my parents and I have no idea who they were or where they are now and frankly, I don't care. I was found by a group of kids and became a part of them. I got my name from my best friend back then, his name was Solo and he said..."

Biting his lip, Duo could feel the little sting in his heart from thinking about his childhood friend. "He said that as long as we were together, we would always be a duo. And when he died he said as long as I kept him in my heart, I would always be a Duo. So I got my name when he died, I went from kid to Duo and I became the leader of the group. We were fine for about a year, stealing to survive, when the Alliance tore our home down and sent us away to a church. The Maxwell church." Duo chuckled when he saw Heero's eyes widen slightly; he knew what the Japanese was thinking now. "I lived there for about a year, I got to go to school for a while and kept getting sent back to the church because I caused so many problems. Father Maxwell and Sister Helen, those are the two who took care of me, taught me a lot, but then... The Alliance came and ruined it all..."

Heero gave him a soft look and placed a warm hand on Duo's shoulder. "They destroyed the church... The rumors said a kid stole a mobile suit from a factory, leading to the destruction of the church... Only one person survived the accident and became known as the Maxwell Demon... It was you... Wasn't it?"

Duo nodded and gave a small smile. "Yeah... Guess there's no need in telling you where I took my last name from, huh? I think back then... when I watched Sister Helen die after giving me a final blessing... that was the first time I cried..."

Heero squeezed Duo's shoulder tenderly before removing the hand and looking down. "I'm... I'm sorry..."

Duo smiled and patted Heero's back. "Don't be. It feels good, looking through old memories every once in awhile. It makes me appreciate what I have now and helps me remember all the things they taught me, things they used to say to me."

Heero looked back up, curiosity visible in his face. "Like?"

Duo chuckled and looked up towards the sky. "There's one thing I remember pretty well. I was in the garden by the church, staring at some birds that were building a nest and I asked a bunch of questions. Why are we here? Where did I come from? Stuff like that. Father Maxwell just smiled and patted my head. He said that he couldn't answer all of the questions because he didn't have answers to them. I said that since he was a man of God, he should know those things, and he'd just laughed and shook his head. He said that as we went through life we would see that there was so much that we didn't understand, and basically, that the only thing we know for sure is that things don't always go the way we planned. But I would see everyday that we wouldn't turn away from trouble. Even if dreams would be crushed, we would stand against it, filled with hope and pride, as one."

Heero nodded and looked down at his feet. "Those were wise words."

Duo nodded. "Father Maxwell was a wise man. But I was so confused over what he said that when he left, I started talking to the birds."

"What did you say to them?"

Duo chuckled and looked at his hand. "I asked them if I had to be so much, if I still could be me, the way I was. And I asked if I could trust in my own heart or if I was just a piece in a bigger plan."

Heero smiled gently and looked up towards the sky. "Did you get any answers?"

Duo smiled and shook his head. "No... I still haven't..."

"If it... helps any... When I was young, I travelled with a man named Odin Lowe. He was the man who killed the real Heero Yuy, and he taught me things I needed to know in order to survive on my own. He died when I was six or seven, I don't quite remember when, but when he died, he said that I always had to trust in my emotions and do what my heart told me to do."

Duo smiled softly and gave Heero a warm look. "You just answered my questions... But I still don't understand the answers."

"Well..." Heero looked at Duo, letting Cobalt lock with Prussian blue. "My heart longed for something and I travelled until I found it. I acted according to my emotions..."

Duo tilted his head, never breaking the eye contact between them. "What did you find?"

Heero swallowed and moved a little closer. "I..."

Duo swallowed too and licked his suddenly dry lips; he could see Heero's Adam's apple bob up and down when he titled his eyes downward before locking them with Heero's eyes again. "Yes?"

He never got an answer. A drunk decided to come stumbling over to the bench between them, screaming in bad German, waving a bottle of Whiskey, almost hitting Duo's head with it.

Heero pulled away and got to his feet. "Let's get out of here," he mumbled and nodded towards the man that had tried to tempt Duo into kissing him. "The company is getting a little too annoying."

Duo chuckled and pushed the man's face away before getting to his feet. "Or a little too friendly, depends on how you look at it."

Heero just snorted and shoved his hands into the pockets of his jacket. "Let's just go home."

Duo nodded and started walking with Heero by his side. "Sure thing. Wanna wrap this cozy evening up with coffee and a bad movie or do ya wanna play knock and run?"

"Let's just get a coffee and a slightly good movie."

They didn't mention that moment again.

_End flashback_

Heero continued to stare at Duo even though the long-haired man was staring at the sky. He remembered Duo's tale very well. All his life he'd lost people close to his heart, first his parents, even though they were still a mystery to him; Solo, Father Maxwell and Sister Helen. All the people Duo had loved and stayed with had ended up dead. It had to be hard to live and get close to people when so many had died around him in the past. Moving a little closer to his friend, Heero pulled his knees up to rest under his chin, then spoke slowly. "What is it about the war that... That you don't regret... Without it, nobody from your past would have died. Maybe you would even have gotten the chance to know your parents."

Duo shook his head and finally moved his gaze from the sky to stare at Heero, a warm twinkle still in his eyes. "Maybe so, but without it, I never would have met Solo, Father Maxwell or any of you guys. I lost the people I loved under tragic circumstances, yes; but I don't regret it. I'd rather cherish the happy memories I created with them rather than think about the sad stuff. I wanna remember all the fun we had instead of thinking about how they died."

Heero blinked but never let his gaze move away from Duo's. He couldn't break the connection between them, not now. "That's... Very strong of you..."

Duo chuckled and let his eyes drop to the ground. "I ain't strong... I'm just trying to live... You were always the strong one."

"No..." Heero gently placed his hand under Duo's chin, tilting his face up until their eyes met, very much like that time at the restaurant. "Duo... I wasn't stronger than anybody else that fought in the war... Yes, I was more determined than you were, but that was because I lived for the missions. Without missions, I was useless... But when you showed me friendship, told me that you wanted a life after the war, I started thinking... and started fighting for my own cause. I wanted to live too, so that I could learn the secrets of life. I drew my strength from the comrades I made, I... I drew my strength from you..."

Duo blinked, feeling his cheeks flame up, while getting a strange feeling of deja vu. "M-me?"

Heero nodded and moved a little closer to his friend. "Yes... I didn't understand you when I first met you, so I wanted to learn more about you, get to know you... You managed to get under my skin and you became an obstacle in my way... But I couldn't kill you, couldn't harm you, never on purpose..."

Duo nodded, pressing into Heero's hand a bit. "Like on colony X-18999 two years ago, huh?"

Heero nodded. "Yeah... I knew that you would follow me no matter what I did, so I had you locked up so I knew you would be safe. At least for a little while..."

Duo gently removed the hand from under his chin, but didn't let it go. "Why? I can take care of myself, I have survived for most of my life on the streets, yanno."

Heero nodded, gently rubbing his thumb against the softness of Duo's hand. "I know, but... I had to make sure that... You stayed alive... I wanted to talk to you... If we both made it..."

Duo's eyes narrowed a little; he could still feel the hurt in his heart. "But you left... You came to us unconscious and beaten up before you were sent to the hospital. You came to us for one night, sleeping in my room before leaving with Relena, and then you vanished without a trace. What was it? What did you want to talk to me about?"

Heero looked down and took a deep breath. "I... Duo, I don't know... All I know is that whenever I was fighting, you were always the one who was behind me, always the one who believed in me when it looked the worst. You cheered us all up, you gave me comfort and you managed to crawl under my skin, burrowing yourself so deeply into my flesh and you found a heart I had forgotten existed... And you made it work again..."

Duo swallowed, the link between them grew stronger. He could feel it. The warmth from Heero's hand seemed to become stronger and the closeness from the Japanese's body was almost unbearable. What was happening? "Heero...?"

"Yes?"

Tilting his head a little to the side, Duo moved his face closer to Heero's. He could see the Japanese teen mimic his motions, bringing his face closer to Duo's until they were so close that their breath was mingling. Feeling his eyes slowly close, Duo swallowed and whispered. "Heero... I..."

"What?" The warmth from Heero's breath brushed over Duo's dry lips, the whisper from his throat almost inaudible. It was only them now.

"I..."

"Duo, Heero, dinner's ready! And 'The Preventers worst Mobile Suit videos' is on in five!"

Jerking their faces away from each other, they could both feel the tingle of a blush over their cheeks. Getting to his feet, Duo brushed the grass off his ass and reached out a hand for Heero. "Suppose we better head in, huh? Maybe we'll see Wufei and Sally on the vid."

Heero nodded and grasped Duo's hand, pulling himself up to his feet. "Maybe. As a top agent he should be a part of those chases they tape."

Duo chuckled and watched as Heero brushed off his own pants. "Unless he has a desk-job."

Heero just smirked and started walking inside. "Come on. Dinner's getting cold."

Duo nodded. "Yeah, yeah. I'm coming, I'm coming..."

The two teens walked inside, both thinking about the moment that had just passed. What was happening between them? What connection was it? Was it possible that-? The stars and the moon were their only witnesses, but they had no answers to give. As the wind brushed over the area, it was almost like a voice could be heard.

_When does life start?_

_Yours start now... And so it begins..._

_Good luck..._

---

Duo leaned against the wall, taking in the night air after a hard day on the scrap-heap. They'd been working since early that morning, stopping only to grab a small bite around lunchtime. Heero had vanished half an hour ago, driving to get them something to eat while Hilde had gone of to visit her boyfriend, David.

"Guess I'm alone now, huh? At least for the time being," Duo mumbled to himself and stared at the night sky. He and Heero hadn't mentioned their latest moment, but too Duo's surprise, Heero wasn't avoiding him. Duo had started tiptoeing around his Japanese friend, afraid to let his secret slip and make a complete idiot out of himself, but Heero acted... More relaxed. After each talk they'd had, after those two moments they'd shared together, Heero seemed to be more relaxed.

"What are you feeling for me, Heero?" Duo asked no-one, staring at the moon. "Is it friendship, love, lust or just plain curiosity?" Sighing, Duo let his gaze drop to the ground. "I wanna tell you what I feel, but... I don't wanna scare you..."

Taking a deep breath, Duo tried to line up his thoughts and straighten them out so he could explain just what he was feeling for the Japanese man. He knew he'd fallen for him ages ago and he knew he had been fascinated by him from the start. He still didn't know why the hell he'd put his entire mission, his life at stake, just to save a guy that happened to have a suit identical to his. It could have been the biggest mistake he'd ever made. Luckily for him, that hadn't been the case.

'_But I did risk a lot by doing that,'_ he though and wrapped his arms around himself. _'I risked my life and my mission for a guy I didn't know... Just because he managed to captivate me with those eyes... I'm such a loser.'_

Looking at the moon, Duo sighed again and mumbled. "Wish you could answer all of my questions, Miss Luna... But I suppose you can't, at least not so I can hear them... So I guess I'll just talk to ya to lighten my heart..."

"Why talk to someone who won't reply?"

Jumping as a voice suddenly spoke up and cold metal was placed against his cheek, Duo spun around, only to be face to face with the man he was thinking about. "Heero?"

Heero smiled and removed the can he'd been pressing against Duo's cheek. "Thought you might want something to drink. It's soda. I also brought some Mexican take-out for the both of us."

Duo smiled softly and accepted the can. "You think your stomach can handle that?"

Heero just smirked and gave Duo a look. "Only one way to find out..."

Duo smiled softly and held up the can Heero had given him. "Thanks, 'Ro. Nice of ya."

Heero just smiled and took a sip from his own soda can. "You're welcome." Settling next to Duo, he looked up at the moon and softly spoke. "So... What were you doing out here?"

Duo smiled softly and opened the can. "Just telling Miss Luna some of my secrets, hoping she could give me some advice."

Heero chuckled. "Could she help?"

Duo sighed and gave Heero a weak smile. "Nope... Quiet as always..."

Heero chuckled softly and stared at the can in his hand. Silence filled the air and Duo couldn't help but feel a little uncomfortable. He wanted to talk, but he had nothing to say. Swallowing, he decided to try. "Heero..."

Heero looked at him and smiled. "I may... I may not be as... Talkative as you... But I am just as good as listening as the moon and I'm just as good as keeping secrets... So... If something is bothering you, I want to help you... I want to prove myself... That I am worthy of being a friend to you... Since you are such a good friend to me..."

Duo gaped for a second, then felt a slight blush cover his cheek. "Wow, thanks, 'Ro... But... I don't think you can help me with this."

Heero moved a little closer and gently touched Duo's shoulder with his hand. "Try me."

"Heero..." Shaking his head, Duo gently removed Heero's hand from his shoulder and sighed. "Certain things... I just have to find out on my own..."

"Duo..." Letting his hand drop from Duo's, Heero looked away and nodded. Duo could see the hurt expression before the shadows covered his face. "I understand..."

"Heero..." Swallowing, Duo gave his friend a pair of pleading eyes; eyes that pleaded for the Japanese to understand. "I wanna tell you... Really I do, it's just..."

"What?" Looking up again, Heero locked his eyes with Duo's, daring the braided teen to break the contact. "What is stopping you?"

Duo could feel how his heart drummed against his ribs, threatening to break out of his chest. He could feel the beginning of tears prickling behind his eyes and cursed himself for being weak. He would _not_ cry in front of his best friend, it would only confuse the poor guy even more. "Heero... Please... Don't do this to me..."

Stepping closer towards his friend, Heero brought his face closer to Duo's, never once breaking the eye contact. "Don't do what to you?"

Swallowing, Duo placed his hands gently on Heero's broad shoulders. He could feel the warmth from Heero's body through the thin shirt and the muscles beneath. Not knowing whether to push him away or pull him closer, he just remained like that, staring into Heero's eyes. "Heero..."

Feeling strong hands settle on his hips, he was slowly pulled closer until his body brushed against Heero's. Prussian blue eyes remained fixated on his, but the pattern of his breathing had changed. It had been slow and calm, but now it was fast.

Not a word was said as seconds flew past; the only sound were the traffic in the streets and a gunshot in the distance. Duo could swear that his heart was as audible as the cars were; that his breath was loud enough to wake the dead. Heero didn't say anything, he only stared into Duo's eyes while keeping his hands lightly on Duo's hips.

"Heero..."

"Shhhh..." Heero's lips curved into a tiny smile and before it vanished, the once Perfect soldier pressed his lips gently to Duo's. It was nothing to write home about; it was only lips meeting lips, but to them, it meant the world. Neither teen dared to press it deeper so after a moment, Heero pulled back, lips still curving in a half-smile.

Duo could feel his cheeks flush and when he opened his mouth to speak, not a word came out. Heero didn't say anything either, he just moved one hand from Duo's hip to stroke some hair away from the braided teen's face before trailing it down his cheek.

Swallowing heavily, Duo stuttered. "W-why did you do t-that?"

Heero just shrugged and looked away. "I don't know."

"What?"

Heero shrugged again and let his hands fall from Duo's hip and cheek. "I don't know why I did it."

Frowning, Duo let his own hands fall from Heero's shoulders and crossed them over his chest. "You just pulled me in close with your body and kissed me and you don't know why you did it? That's got to be a joke."

Heero frowned and crossed his own arms. "I am confused, okay?"

"Confused? Heero, I am confused to, I don't know what I'm doing most of the time I'm awake, but I don't walk around kissing people just because I'm confused!"

Heero groaned and once again fixed his eyes on Duo's. "I am confused about you!"

Duo gaped before his common sense told him to shut his mouth. "Oh... Right..." Swallowing a little, he could feel the flush burning. Damn, would he never get rid of the redness on his face? He wanted to say something, but couldn't figure out anything. _'Great, Maxwell, you've only had Heero Yuy in your dreams for the last two or three years and now you've finally got the chance to say something! Help him, dammit!' _

"Why?" _'Yeah, Maxwell, that'll help him. You're such a loser...'_

Heero blinked before sighing and removing his gaze again. "I... I don't know, Duo... I don't know why... It just happened..."

Duo continued to stare at the Japanese teen. "It just happened," he repeated slowly.

Heero sighed and leaned against the wall, thumping his head against the wood. "Well, it didn't just happen, I wanted to do it, but... I still don't know why. I'm just so confused about myself, about you... I came here... I came to you..." Releasing an angry growl, Heero thumped his head against the wall again.

Duo just sighed and placed his hand between Heero's head and the wall to prevent Heero from thumping his head a third time. "Stop that, Heero, you're ruining my wall..."

Heero gave a little snort, but didn't smile. "Sorry..."

Duo just nodded and removed his hand. "'S okay..."

Leaning against the wall next to Heero, Duo gently wrapped his arms around himself and sighed while tilting his head upwards until the back of his skull connected with the wall with a soft thump. Minutes passed and not a word was spoken; the only thing audible were the cars on the streets and the faint sound of the two teens breathing. When the silence became to much for the braided American to handle, he looked at Heero and whispered. "Heero... I..."

Heero didn't look back at him but he could tell that he had the Wing-pilot's attention. Sighing again, Duo looked from the sky to the ground. He wanted to look at Heero, wanted the Japanese teen to know every emotion that swirled around in him, but he didn't dare. _'One step at a time,' _he told himself and took a deep breath. "You say... You say you're confused about me... Well... At times... I'm confused about you too."

Stealing a little glance out of the corner of his eye, he could see that Heero was carefully looking at him too. Deciding to just lay all the cards out on the table, Duo took a deep breath. "I'm Duo, I run and hide, but never lie... And I've been running and hiding from certain emotions for a while now... but I've never lied about them... And I think that you, as my best friend, has the right to know them... Since you are... Well, involved in those feelings."

Suppressing a little snort as he heard Heero's own breath hitch a little, he felt a little of the weight in his heart lift. The change in Heero's breathing patterns were barely noticeable unless you'd spent two wars with the guy and learned to read his moods just by the way he breathed.

Taking a deep breath, Duo decided that he might as well continue. "I've... I've always liked you, Heero, both as a friend and... Well, as a brother even, but... that changed over time, I'm not sure when..."

Staring up at the sky, Duo tried his best to put his thoughts into words. He knew what he felt, but voicing his feelings wasn't all that easy. "I... I think that the first time I saw you, I was... captivated by you. Your eyes; they were so intense that it seemed like you burned a hole straight into my soul. So after I shot you, I felt kinda bad and I didn't even know why! So I decided that I wanted to talk to ya about your Gundam; what you were doing with Relena and other stuff, but it kinda slipped my mind when I saw you again. And when you jumped head first without releasing your parachute... Man, you scared me to death!"

"But you pulled through anyway, and I became even more fascinated with you. I wanted to learn more about you, but you pushed me away." Chuckling slightly, Duo let a small smile play on his lips and closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of the artificial wind blowing through his bangs. "I think that kinda pulled a trigger in me so instead of giving you up, I became more intrigued, I wanted to get to know you. It was a hard job, and painful at times, but every time you opened up, even just slightly, I felt that all the hard work was worth it. It showed me that under that hard shell of yours, there was a human being that wanted to come out, and I wanted to be there when that happened. I kinda felt that... If I managed to help you, I could forgive myself for all the mistakes I've made in my past... But my plan kinda backfired on me because..."

Sighing slightly, Duo let his head drop forward, eyes still closed. "I wanted to be the one you could proudly call a best friend, someone that would be there for you when you needed me, someone you could talk to... Someone you could trust... But then… My intentions changed... I fell in love with you... and I wanted to be by your side all the time. I wanted you to notice me, accept me, see me as your partner. I searched for you when you were missing, I cried every time I thought you were dead..."

"I'm not sure when it happened. I think it was when the Eve War started. You came to me in search of someone you trusted that could help you and I was only too glad to help you. After all, you came to me. Not Quatre, not Trowa, not the Preventers. But me. I was happy. But I could only watch as you... Well... I guess you can say 'put me out of harm's way' and ran of to save the world yet again. And I could only step back as Relena took my place by your side and broke through the final shell around your heart..."

Swallowing heavily, Duo tried to prevent the tears from appearing in his eyes so he squeezed them tighter together. "Well you left with her... I was sure that my final chance with you was over... You didn't need an L-2 street-rat by your side, not when you had everything you could ever want with her... So I tried my best to forget you, to get on with my life... But at every gathering Quatre held, I secretly hoped that you would be there, even though I knew you would never come..."

"I managed to suppress my feelings for you and get on with my life; but I could never forget you. I just couldn't. I kept you in a tight, secure location in my heart so that I could look to you so you could lend me strength and be there when my days look the worst... And then you appeared on my doorstep and all those feelings I'd managed to suppress came bursting out again."

Pushing himself from the wall, Duo turned to face Heero and to his surprise Heero was standing right in front of him. He didn't say anything, only stared with an intense gaze that reminded Duo of the time they'd first met. Swallowing, Duo whispered. "I love you, but I... I don't want you to fear me, Heero... I won't do anything you don't want me to do, I won't jump you in the shower or when you're asleep. I can't promise you that I won't ogle you every once in a while, but I will never do anything that you feel uncomfortable with... I just wanna be in your life, in anyway I can... I lost my best friend once, Heero... I don't wanna lose you again... I couldn't handle it, to see you walk away from me again without knowing where I stand with you..." Dropping his head to the ground, Duo let his eyes remain closed so that the tears would remain hidden. He could feel them pressing behind his eyelids but refused to let them drop. He'd just spilled his heart out in front of Heero, there was no way he wanted to lose his dignity by crying.

Heero's eyes softened ever so slightly and slid a finger under Duo's chin, tilting his head up enough so that they were face to face. The finger was soon joined by it's four comrades and after a moment a warm hand was trailing over Duo's cheek in a gentle caress.

Duo could feel himself shiver at the touch from that hand, knowing all to well what those hands were capable of doing. He had seen Heero bend steel bars with them like they were made of melted butter, yet now they were so soft and tender, caressing his cheek and face in a way he'd never believed Heero could.

Letting his eyes gently slide open, he let them connect with Heero's Prussian blue eyes. He didn't say anything, just let the Japanese continue the gentle caress. If this was the only thing he could get, then he wanted to savor the feeling as long as possible.

"I'm not scared of you..."

Swallowing, Duo could felt his heart thump against his chest and halfway wondered if his heart would explode out of his chest anytime soon.

Heero just continued the caress before his hand stopped and gently cupped Duo's cheek instead. Repeating the words, Heero gently smiled a tiny smile. "I'm not scared of you, Duo..."

Letting his hand trail down Duo's cheek, running gently down over Duo's neck and shoulder before it continued down a slim arm, Heero let his hand gently stop by Duo's own, slender hand and let it stay there. He didn't grasp the hand, he didn't entwine their fingers. He just let his hand be like a shelter around Duo's slightly cold fingers.

"I... I can't tell you as... openly as you have... what I feel about you; simply because I don't know just what I feel for you... But all those times I've come to you in the past as I have now... I have done so for a reason, because... Because I feel safe with you... I know I can trust you and I know you will trust me. I know I can talk with you without you laughing about what I have to say."

Duo gently smiled and whispered. "No subject is too insane, no conversation is too silly..."

Heero smiled back a little more before speaking on. "I never wish to hurt you, Duo... Not in any way... So I can't say what I know you wanna hear, judging by what you've just told me, simply because I don't know what I feel yet... I do love you, Duo... But I don't know how strong that love is. I love you as my dearest friend, as a brother. But for now, that's all I can say for certain."

Biting his lips slightly, Heero paused for a second. "Relena... Relena once told me that... kissing is a way of passing on your feelings to someone else and to better understand your own, but... I have to admit... As enjoyable as it has been, kissing you has only confused me even more... And it scares me... To be as confused as I am right now... I'm just so used to understanding everything I'm doing... But this isn't exactly a mission..."

Duo just nodded dumbly as Heero spoke. He didn't know what to say. He wanted to say something, anything that could help the Japanese to better understand his emotions, but he was afraid that if he said something he would confuse him even more. Or even worse, scare him away for good, because it was clear to him, as plain as daylight, that Heero was scared. Both the way he acted, and the fact that the perfect soldier had just admitted it showed Duo that Heero was everything but comfortable in this situation. "I... I understand," he whispered after a moment of silence and broke the eye-contact between them.

Heero just tightened his grip on Duo's hand. "I'm sorry..."

Duo smiled weakly and looked back into Heero's eyes. "It's okay, Heero. I understand. You need time and I'm willing to give you all the time you need. After all, we've got a while to spent together if ya wanna. The peace has just started, we've got a full lifetime if we're lucky."

Heero nodded and bit his lip. Then, in the blink of an eye, he had pulled Duo's body in full contact with his own, arms locked tightly around his waist and face buried in the nape of Duo's neck. "I wanna understand... But the only thing I know for sure is that you are special to me... But I don't know in what way..."

Duo gently wrapped his own arms around Heero's shoulders and he could feel the faint shivering that came from his body. _'God, the guy's a emotional mess! It must have taken him ages to summon up enough courage and guts in order for him to have done this! I gotta help him in some way... But how?'_

Swallowing heavily, Duo tightened his own grip around Heero's neck and opened his mouth. But as soon as the words had left him, he regretted them. "You know... There is another way that... That'll show us both... How you feel, besides kissing... It might help you understand your emotions."

Heero lifted his head and gave him a quizzical look, then his eyes widened. Maybe he was inexperienced when it came to relationships and sex, but he was no fool. He understood perfectly well what Duo was offering. "No. No, I can't do that."

Duo halfway expected Heero to let go of him and yell at him in disgust, but instead the grip around his waist was tightened and the Prussian eyes took on a mix of soft and hard. "I can't do that to you, Duo. No matter how confused I might be, you're still my best friend, no matter what! I can't go and take advantage of you in such a way simply to find out if I swing that way or have stronger feelings than friendship towards you. If we do that and I find out that I don't love you the way you love me, you'll be hurt in more ways than one. I just can't do that to you, even though it is you who suggested it. I just... Can't do it to you... Not in such a way..."

Duo nodded, understanding Heero's words. He was touched that Heero cared enough to not want to hurt him in any way, but at the same time as he was happy, he felt a sting of sadness. He didn't know why; sleeping with someone in the way he'd just suggested was against everything he believed in, but yet... The thought of having Heero touch him in any way, just once... He wanted it more than anything. "If that's how you feel... I... Thank you for caring for me in such a manner... But I want you to know... If you ever need me in any way... I'm willing to help."

Heero nodded, then whispered carefully. "But not like that... I couldn't do that to you... As much as I... Want to... I can't do it...

Feeling his breath hitch a little, Duo pulled back. Heero wanted to? Then... Why didn't he? Duo was used to watching the perfect soldier take everything and do anything in order to get what he needed. If he needed information, he would kill to get it. Money, he'd rob someone's (mostly rich people from OZ) account. Now, Heero was standing in the biggest emotional mess he'd ever been in, but had turned down an offer to help him get out of it. And knowing Heero, Duo knew that the perfect soldier hated to be confused in any way. Duo didn't know whether to feel confused or moved.

Deciding that enough was enough, Duo pulled back from the tight embrace and gave Heero's shoulder a little squeeze. "I think we both need a little time-out. Why don't we just eat that food you brought us and relax for the rest of the evening. Mexican, was it?"

Heero nodded, then used his hand to cover Duo's and gave it a little squeeze. "I'm sorry..."

Duo just smiled and shook his head. "'S okay, Heero. I told you, I understand. You've never been good with emotions because you've never been allowed to learn about them. Now that you're free and your emotions are out of the prison in you, you're confused. But I'll try my best to help you, okay? To teach you. Let's just eat and get a good night's sleep. If ya wanna, we can discuss this in the morning. After all, most of our salvage deals are closed and we've got a few days off to enjoy it."

Heero nodded again and released Duo's hand, but not before giving it another little squeeze. "Thank you..."

Duo just smiled and nodded. "Anytime, buddy... I told ya not too long ago that if you ever needed me, you just had to yell."

Heero chuckled and nodded. "I remember..."

Duo's smile widened a little before nodding towards the house. "Come on. Let's eat before the food gets cold. We must have been out here for hours! It sure feels like it, at least."

Heero nodded and followed the braided American back into the house, firmly keeping his eyes on Duo's back and not on the swaying of his hips. As desirable as Duo was, Heero would not allow himself to take advantage of his best friend like that. He just couldn't hurt Duo in such a way. Sure, it had been Duo who had made the offer in the first place, but Heero knew that Duo would have regretted the words as soon as they'd slept together. Unless he already did.

The meal passed in silence, the only sound came from the TV and the traffic outside.

Duo was watching a pre-colonial movie called "Rambo" while eating a mix of beans, rice and chilli, laughing as the big guy in the movie seemed to be running away from the entire country. Personally, Heero didn't understand what was so funny about it, but then again he hadn't been watching the movie either.

He'd been thinking ever since Duo made that offer a short while ago, deciding whether or not he should accept it. He wanted answers, needed answers, but didn't know if sleeping with his best friend would gain him anything. And he didn't know if he could bear hurting Duo in such a way. He knew that if he didn't feel the same way, Duo would get hurt. But at the same time, the offer was so tempting.

Stealing another glance at Duo as he slowly chewed his food, he had to admit that the idea turned him on. Duo was desirable, no doubt about that. He had a lovely face, a nice body and Heero was sure that underneath the dark clothes were many pleasant surprises. The thought of touching Duo's bare skin was... tempting. But he just... He couldn't do it. Or could he? If he found out that his feelings for Duo ran deeper than just brotherly love, then it would be okay, wouldn't it?

Keeping his eyes fixed on Duo as the braided teen ate, Heero put down his fork, decision made. "Duo. I accept the offer."

Feeling some of the rice get stuck in his throat, Duo started coughing and banged his chest. As soon as he managed to catch his breath, Duo fixed his eyes on Heero's, finding only seriousness written in those deep pools. "S-say what?"

Heero put his plate down and moved closer to Duo, removing Duo's plate as well. "I said, I accept your offer."

Swallowing, Heero gently took Duo's hands in his and stared deep into his eyes. "If it's still on."

Duo nodded dumbly and swallowed as well. "Y-yeah, it's still on. But why did you change your mind? I thought you said-"

"I know what I said," Heero growled and Duo could clearly see the anger and confusion in Heero's eyes. And it scared him. "I know I said that I couldn't do that to you, but I'm tired of this! For two years I've been travelling around, searching for answers without finding them and trying to understand my emotions! I started my search with Relena, hoping that she could help me, but she knew that I would never desire her anymore than just as a friend and sent me away to find my true desires! She gave me advice, everybody I met on my travels gave me advice and after two years I'd built up enough courage to come and face you! I didn't expect to just fall in love with you when I saw you again, that only happens in bad romance movies, but what I hadn't expected was that the sight of you would only confuse me more. During the time I've been here, I've used every piece of advice I've received, everything from getting to know you better to kissing you, but it has only confused me more. And yet... The longer I stay here, the more I've noticed about myself... And about you... I've noticed every little habit you have. Like you always wait for the phone to ring three times before you pick it up because you believe all good comes in threes. And that you look through your photo album at least once a day. That you always call Quatre on Thursdays. Not because he's less busy on those days, but because you know that for some strange reason Quatre's favorite day is Thursday."

Shaking his head angrily, Heero broke the contact with Duo for a second, letting the braided teen register everything he'd just said, before continuing. "Duo... I love spending time with you... I love being with you... I love talking to you... But I can't take this confusion anymore... I have used every piece of advice I've ever been offered, but the answers just confuse me more... So I only have one option left... The option you gave me... Unless you don't wanna..."

Duo swallowed before gently raising his hand to cup Heero's cheek. "The offer still stands... But I don't want to hurt you in any way. I want to be sure that this is what you want. That you know that this is what you need. I don't want you waking up and regretting this, for you to hightail it away from me."

Heero gently covered Duo's hand with his. "I think I want this... I know I need this... But I don't want you to regret this either... I don't want to..."

Duo shook his head and gave him a gentle smile. "As long as you promise not to run away from me after... That you... promise that we'll talk about this in the morning whatever happens now... I love you, Heero... But as long as we can stay friends, I can accept this... I think that our friendship is... strong enough for us to handle it."

Heero nodded and tilted his head into Duo's hand. "I can't promise that I won't become... distanced after this... But I promise that... No matter what happens, you will always be my friend..."

Duo nodded and leaned a little closer. "Then that's good enough for me..."

Deciding that they'd talked enough, Heero sealed the gap between them and captured Duo's lips in a heated kiss. Bringing his hand up to gently rub over Duo's neck and shoulders, he wormed his tongue into the wet cave behind the braided teen's lips and was welcomed by Duo's own, wet muscle. He moaned as he felt Duo's own hands and fingers run over his neck, through his hair and down his back and slipped his own arm around a slim waist, pulling his soon-to-be-lover closer to him.

Hands started exploring on their own over unknown territory as they gently touched and felt each others bodies, first through clothing. Then Heero grew a little a bolder, slipping a slightly cold hand under Duo's black T-shirt. Heero broke the kiss and started kissing down over Duo's jaw and neck while savoring the feeling of touching Duo's body for the first time. He wanted to enjoy it, wanted Duo to enjoy it. And he wanted to remember. Remember how Duo's skin felt under his fingertips, wanted to remember the way Duo shivered when he touched him.

Releasing a throaty groan as Heero attacked his neck with small bites and tender kisses, Duo let himself get lost in the pleasure. He was going to regret this in the morning; he knew he would, but he managed to chase the thoughts away by repeating to himself that he was doing this for Heero, not himself. But he couldn't help but feel lousy over the fact that there was no real love behind this.

He loved Heero, but neither of them knew if the love was returned. This would only be a helper for Heero to find out what he really felt. There was a fifty-fifty chance that it would be a one-time thing. And he knew it.

Still, he let Heero continue to touch him, to kiss him, while halfway praying that this would end well for the both of them.

Resisting the urge to mark the pale skin underneath his lips, Heero stopped the act and stared at Duo. "Maybe we should take this someplace a little more private..."

"Good thinking," Duo mumbled and allowed himself to be pulled up by the Japanese teen. Avoiding Heero's gaze, he slowly led them to his bedroom, wondering if Heero could hear how his heart thumped against his chest. Stopping in front of his bed, Duo stared at it. Was he doing the right thing? Could he really help Heero this way? Or was he doing this because it was possibly his only chance to be with Heero in a intimate way? But was this what he really wanted? A one-night roll between the sheets and have his heart quite possibly broken in the morning?

Quietly following the braided teen to his bedroom, Heero wondered what Duo was thinking now. There was tension between them and he could feel it. When Duo stopped in front of his bed, Heero gently placed his arms around the American's waist and whispered. "Duo... If you want to change your mind... Now is the time... Before we take it too far..."

Duo swallowed, but still allowed himself to lean back against Heero's chest. A part of him wanted to pull away, to forget this stupid idea, but the other part was still convinced that he could help his friend this way. _'If my body can help him find out what he feels, then damn I wanna help him,'_ he thought stubbornly and shook his head. "No, Heero... I said I would help you and I will..."

Heero nodded and pressed a gentle kiss to Duo's neck. He wanted to say something to ease the situation. Anything. Preferably three small words, two in Japanese, but he couldn't say them. Not when he didn't know the meaning of them. For now... he would just have to pray that when they woke up in the morning, he could hug Duo close to him and tell him what he wanted to say and everything would be okay.

Gently lowering Duo onto the bed, Heero stared deep into his eyes as tenderly as he could. "Tell me if you want me to stop..."

Duo nodded and pulled Heero down for a kiss. Feeling the strong hands that had previously caressed his back, he shivered and slowly closed his eyes. As wrong as this felt, he wanted to take what he could get.

Heero carefully explored Duo's mouth with long, lazy strokes from his tongue, enjoying the taste of his soon-to-be-lover, both hoping and praying that this wouldn't be the last time he would taste the wonderful flavor.

After a moment of careful and gentle kisses and caresses, Heero broke the kiss in exchange for that tempting white neck. Placing a little kiss on the white skin, Heero slowly slipped his hand under Duo's shirt, caressing his sides with small touches and strokes from his fingers. He could feel Duo's body arch under him and that sweet, husky voice was making the most beautiful sounds. He could get used to this.

Carefully biting at the creamy neck, Heero brought his fingers up to brush over a nipple, gently tweaking the hardening nub between his fingers. Hearing Duo's sharp intact of breath only encouraged him more and Heero bit down, sucking hard on the braided teen's neck while rubbing the nub between his thumb and index finger. He could feel Duo push his hips towards his crotch and his own half hard erection rubbed across Duo's.

Breaking the kiss long enough to remove Duo's shirt, Heero started to explore the unfamiliar territory. Duo's skin felt as fantastic as he'd imagined it would; his body rippled with muscles, yet the skin was as soft as a baby's. Placing a kiss on the braided teen's chest, Heero continued the gentle exploration of the self-proclaimed God of Death's body, memorizing every curve, every sensitive spot.

Duo's body was humming. Who knew that the Perfect soldier, the guy that could bend steel with his bare hands, would be so loving, so tender with his touches? Every soft caress, every kiss that was placed on his skin was so gentle, barely noticeable, that it made Duo's heart swell. Pulling at Heero's shirt, he slipped it over Heero's head so he too could touch and feel.

As soon as his shirt had left his body, Heero continued his exploration, kissing, sucking and licking every spot he could reach. His hands carefully rubbed over Duo's sides as he felt Duo's own hand run over his back and through his hair. He heard himself sigh in pleasure as he continued to explore Duo's body with both his lips and hands.

He supported his weight with his left hand while the other ran over the planes of Duo's body, over his chest, down his stomach before dipping into his navel. Coming to a stop at the waistband of Duo's pants, he let the digit trail the fabric in a teasing motion, earning a shiver from the braided teen.

Lifting his head up from Duo's chest, he looked down at the braided teen's flushed face. His lips were red and swollen by kisses, his eyes were half-closed and glazed over with lust while his breath came out in small pants. Looking over Duo's body, Heero could see the tiny bite-marks and love-bites that marked the skin, and behind the denim of the braided teen's pants lay the obvious desire. Signs Heero himself had created.

Swallowing, he looked back at Duo's face. Red lips, the small breaths, the whimpers of pleasure. "I can't do this..."

Pulling back as if he'd been burned, Heero stared at Duo with wide eyes. Duo lifted his upper body and stared back at Heero with confused and slightly hurt eyes. Kiss-swollen lips, marked skin, his erection pressed against the front of his jeans. Duo had let him do all this to him out of love, but Heero couldn't go through with it. He just couldn't use Duo in such a way, even if he did feel the same way. He just couldn't.

"I can't do this..." he mumbled again, wide eyes still fixed on Duo.

"Heero?"

Scrambling out of the bed, Heero grabbed his shirt and pulled it over his head. "I'm sorry, I can't go through with this. I can't."

Moving so that he was on his hands and knees, Duo crawled over the bed before sitting up. "Heero, I don't understand."

Shaking his head, Heero tried his best to ignore the hurt face that belonged to his best friend. "I can't go through with it. I'm sorry. I have to think." His words came out in a rush, but he didn't care. He had to get out of there, had to sort out his thoughts, had to think.

Turning to face Duo, Heero gave him a sad look in return. "I have to go. I need some time to think."

Blinking, Duo felt his heart skip a beat. "You're... You're leaving?"

Heero nodded and watched as Duo looked down. Grasping Duo's chin, he made the braided teen look at him. "I'll be back... That was the part of the deal. I just... Need some time to think... Don't wait up for me..."

Then he left, leaving a hurt and confused Duo to his thoughts.

Collapsing onto the bed, Duo punched his hand into his pillow and cursed. "Dammit!" Feeling tears press behind his eyes, he squeezed his eyes shut hard as he heard the door to the house shut with a soft click. Heero had left. Hugging the pillow close to his chest, Duo let a few off the tears escape their prison. "Dammit, Heero... Why'd ya leave...?"

"_I just... Need some time to think... Don't wait up for me..."_

He didn't listen to Heero's words and remained up all night, staring out the window while hoping that Heero would return. In the back of his mind, he knew that Heero wouldn't return, not yet. If he did return at all. And when the artificial sun set in over the colony and a new day of work began, Hilde found the self-proclaimed God of Death sleeping, his head resting against the window and trails of tears clearly visible on his cheeks.

---

Duo sighed as he stared through the window, watching the gate that lead into the scrap yard before looking back down to the papers he was holding in his hands, waiting to be signed. It had been two weeks and he hadn't heard a word from the perfect soldier.

Swallowing, Duo grabbed a pencil from behind his ear and scribbled down his name before putting it away. Bringing the tip of the pencil to his lips, he started chewing on it while resting his head in his hands, a blank expression covering his face.

"Duo? Would you like some coffee?" Hilde stared at her friend, worry written all over his face. Duo had been acting oddly every since Heero had vanished. He had trouble sleeping, a loss of appetite and was moody. But mostly he walked around with a look of defeat.

Sighing, she sat down next to the braided teen as she failed to get a reply on the coffee question. "Duo... You can't go on like this... It's not healthy..."

Duo sighed and let the pencil drop from his lips. Staring at it, Duo murmured softly. "I just don't get it... Why didn't he do it? I gave him my permission, I wanted it... Still, he ran off..."

Hilde gently placed her hand on Duo's shoulder and gave it a light squeeze. "Maybe that's why he ran... You told him how you felt and I guess he didn't want to hurt you when he knew he wasn't sure if he felt the same way... Cause you would have been hurt either way had Heero gone through with it..."

"Maybe so..." Sighing, Duo stared out of the window and watched as the artificial sun started to set. "But he could have talked to me... He didn't have to run..."

Hilde squeezed his shoulder again and placed her cheek to rest against Duo's. "You know Heero... He doesn't like to be confused and when he is, he wants to solve it on his own..."

Duo just snorted, but still brought a hand up to rub against Hilde's. "I guess..."

Stroking her free hand over Duo's hair, Hilde smiled and pecked his cheek. "So lighten up, bro. He said he would be back, didn't he? And when he returns, we can both yell at him and make him beg before we forgive him."

Duo chuckled weakly and glanced over at the smaller woman. "No need to go that far, is there?"

Hilde gave him a firm look in return. "Just because he's confused doesn't mean that what he did was right. He owes you an explanation."

"Does he now?" Duo sighed and shrugged. "I'm not even sure if he owes me anything anymore. The more I think about it, the more confused I get... I mean, I have to try and see this from Heero's point of view as well, not just my own..."

Hilde nodded and got up. "I understand, Duo... Just... Don't jump back in, in the blink of an eye. Make him tell you where you stand... I don't want you to suffer... It was bad enough seeing the lack of a light in your eyes for two years after Heero left the last time..."

Duo smiled weakly and nodded. "I'll do that... Thanks, Hilde..."

Hilde patted his shoulder and gave him a smile in return. "I'll make dinner... You try and finish those papers to get your mind of Heero for a while."

Duo nodded and went back to his reports, trying his best to drive the thoughts of Heero away. It was too much to hope that Heero would return his feelings, the fact that they had gone as far as groping was surprising enough. But still he couldn't help the ache in his chest as he remembered Heero's hasty retreat.

Placing his pencil behind his ear, Duo started reading over the papers and slowly let any thoughts of Heero slip from his mind.

Then the phone rang.

---

The second he had shut the door after running away from Duo, Heero had regretted it. Letting his head fall backwards until it hit the door with a soft thump, Heero closed his eyes and swallowed.

He'd been so close, so close to actually sleeping with his friend. He'd been so close to hurting his very best friend, one of the few that actually understood him, and he loathed himself for it. Squeezing his eyes shut, he let the cool air brush over his heated skin, letting it cool his body down.

The way Duo had looked at him during those few moments Heero had caressed him, touched him and kissed him, he'd looked so beautiful and Heero had felt that there wasn't a thing in the world he wouldn't give for his friend. But was it love he felt? He didn't know and until he found out, he couldn't allow himself to fool or hurt Duo anymore. He needed some time to think and he needed it now.

Pushing himself away from the door, Heero took the first heavy step away from the braided man within. He felt as if this was the hardest thing he'd ever done in his entire life. Each step felt so heavy and the further he got away from the scrap yard, the more distant he felt from Duo.

Maybe he was simply destined to be alone... Destined to roam the surface of the earth and colonies, being a tool for others to use. Maybe he was never meant to be happy. What had he ever done to deserve happiness?

Shaking his head firmly, Heero walked away from the scrap yard, not looking back once. Roughly shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans, Heero wondered where to go now, wondered where he could turn.

The wind started to pick up as Heero walked down the street, cutting into the thin jacket he was wearing and making him shiver. Pulling the fabric closer around his throat, he made his way down another street in search of a place to stay for the night.

Passing about a dozen strip-clubs and bars, ignoring the whistles and catcalls he received, Heero found himself a little motel, a very cheap one by the look of it. The name "Blue Peach" blinked over the door, the 'L' and 'P' were dark. The building looked like it was going to fall down any second; the windows were dirty and it smelt like something had died in the area. Moans and thumbing noises came from the alley beside it, but Heero didn't care. For tonight, it would serve his purpose.

Stepping into the building, Heero tried his best not to breathe through his nose because the stench was worse, but it still left a nasty taste in his mouth. The air was thick with the smoke from cigarettes and alcohol, and he frowned when he stepped over a dead rat on the floor.

Stepping up to the counter, Heero cleared his throat and tried to get the attention of a girl reading a magazine behind it. Looking up, she blew a big bubble from the gum she was chewing before popping it and licking it up again. Traces from the pink gum were still visible on her nose. "Can I help you?"

Heero coughed a little and fanned the air to get rid of the of smoke. He could swear he could smell the scent of gunpowder too. "I would like a room for the night."

The girl nodded and put down her magazine before pulling out a dirty book from a bookshelf behind her. "How long?" she asked while opening it and fishing up a pen from a drawer.

Heero looked around, studying the area and the situation he was in. "I… I'm not sure," he said finally.

The girl nodded again and blew another bubble. "I'll book ya daily then. Register here everyday that you're here and pay. Five bucks per night."

Heero nodded and accepted the pen when the girl handed it to him. Scribbling down his name, he left the slot his address blank and handed the book back.

The girl looked at it. "Your address?"

Heero shrugged. "I live here now…"

The girl nodded and scribbled something down. "Would you like extra service while you're here?"

Heero raised an eyebrow and looked at the girl. He knew what she meant. "No, thank you."

The girl nodded again and scribbled down something more before handing Heero a keycard. "Room 121. It's cleaned up. Food you get on your own; we don't serve here, except when it comes to your bodily needs."

Heero nodded and took the key. "I have no bodily needs…" Looking around, he stared at a pay phone near the counter and pointed at it. "But I want to borrow the phone."

The girl waved her hand towards it and picked up her magazine. "Knock yourself out, dude."

---

A.C. 198, Earth, Vice Foreign Minister's residence:

Relena yawned as she filed the last of her papers and put her organizer away. Looking up as her vid-phone rang, she rubbed her eyes and tried to look at least a little awake before answering. "Yes?"

"Miss Darlian. There's a phone call for you from a mister Heero Yuy. He wishes to speak with the Vice Foreign Minister. Do you wish for me to take a message or shall I tell him that you are busy?"

Relena quickly shook her head. "No, put him through. Mister Yuy is a dear friend of mine."

"As you wish, Miss Darlian."

Fixing up her hair, Relena tried to look a little more presentable before letting the call connect. "Vice Foreign Minister Darlian."

"Hello, Relena..." Heero's tired and stoic face graced the screen and Relena couldn't help but smile at the sight of the ex-Gundam Pilot.

"Heero, so nice to see you again. How are you?"

"I'm... Alright," Heero replied after a while and Relena could now clearly see a hint of sadness in Heero's eyes.

"Heero, are you sure you're alright?"

Heero looked down for a second before letting his Prussian blue eyes meet Relena's own. "I need some advice."

Relena couldn't help but chuckle a little. Heero was never the one to walk around a subject. He always jumped straight to the problem. "Why don't you tell me what's bothering you first. Then I can see if I can help."

Heero nodded and took a deep breath before telling Relena about his current situation, about his current state of confusion, how he'd travelled for so long without finding a place in life nor answers to his questions, about his current relationship with Duo and how he'd just fled the scene when he'd had his chance at maybe starting something deeper with the braided American. Sighing deeply, Heero murmured softly after finishing his tale. "I know it was stupid of me to just run away, but I have too many questions and no one but me can answer them... I know I hurt him... But I think by staying I would have hurt him more..."

Relena nodded and gently rubbed her temple. "Let me get this straight, Heero. Duo has feelings for you. Deep feelings, I might add. You think you may have feelings for him, but you don't know how deep. Duo suggested sex as a way of finding out both your preferences and your feelings, but you backed away in the middle of it in fear that you might hurt him deeply if you found out that you didn't feel the same thing."

Heero nodded. "That's the gist of it."

Relena nodded and placed her elbow on the table before placing her head on her hand. "It sounds to me that he was trying to use you. I mean, he likes you and then suddenly suggests sex..."

"Duo isn't like that!" Heero barked out, then almost shrunk when he realized that he'd shouted. "Duo... I was the one who took the final step. He merely suggested it and we placed every card on the table before we even thought about going to bed together..."

Relena nodded and closed her eyes. "I understand. Forgive me, Heero, I have no right to talk about Duo like that. I just don't know him as well as you do."

Heero nodded and turned quiet for a moment. Relena could almost see the wheels in Heero's head turn as the ex-Wing pilot started thinking, clenching the phone so hard that she could hear the creaks from slowly breaking plastic down the line. After a few minutes, Heero looked at Relena. "Relena... You're my friend and you're human... And you're a girl..."

"Thank you for noticing," she chuckled, but quickly shut up as Heero sent her a little glare; not as hard as they used to be, but enough to send chills down her spine. "Forgive me, Heero. Do continue."

"Thank you..." Clearing his throat, Heero continued. "Relena... I need some advice... I... I have no idea what to do about this... This... This mess I've created."

"Have you tried talking to him?" the Vice Foreign Minister suggested, receiving a firm head-shake in return.

"No, I haven't. I... I don't know what to say... I gave him my word that I wouldn't run away after... After our session, I promised him that we would talk about it in the morning. But I broke the promise, I went back on my word... I told him that I would be back, but... How can he trust me now?"

"I see..." Relena nodded while picking up a pencil and a piece of paper. "Where are you know?"

"Relena?" Heero blinked and stared at the woman.

Relena flashed him a smile in return and tapped the pencil onto the vid-com screen. "Where are you? I'm coming to see you and talk to you about this. This is too personal to be discussing on the phone."

Heero frowned. "What about your work? You can't just leave it all just because I have a few emotional problems. Just... give me some advice and I can figure the rest out on my own."

Relena shook her head, still smiling brightly. "My work can be done by others, I have finished the most urgent cases and when a friend of mine is in need, I want to be there for him."

Heero nodded, but a small frown was still visible on his brow. "Thank you..."

Relena just smiled and scribbled down Heero's location before telling him that she would be there in a week or two. Travelling from earth to the colonies always took a few days and she had to rearrange more than a few appointments to make it.

Heero thanked her again before breaking the connection, leaving the screen black. Relena sighed and placed the phone back down onto the receiver before looking at the address she'd just written down. "Oh, Heero," she sighed and stroked her finger over the paper. "I wish I knew the answers you are seeking... But this is something only you can answer..."

Getting onto her feet, she walked over to the large window in her office and stared out over the ocean. The sun was about to set, sending beautiful rays of light over the water, making it red and sparkle. This was one of the wonders of nature that the colonies wasn't able to copy. Pressing her hand against the cold window, she sighed again and closed her eyes.

She might have matured over the two years the peace had lasted, but she still had a longing in her heart; the longing to have Heero by her side. But he didn't love her and she knew it. The former soldier might be confused over his feelings and life, but to Relena the feelings might as well have been written on the Japanese man's face.

She had set him free and that day he'd walked out the door without a word. She needed him, but had the heart to set him free to find his own life and strength, hoping that the soldier would follow his emotions and his heart. And his heart had led him to the shabby colony known as L2.

A.C. 198. L2. Blue Peach Motel:

Heero sighed as he closed the door to his room and slumped down on the bed. Even though the motel itself was in pretty bad condition, the rooms weren't half bad. That was probably because of what was normally going on in there. The bed was comfortable enough and the sheets were clean. The couch was also acceptable, but slightly dirty and the coffee table looked like it was about to fall apart. The toilet and the shower were in perfect order, but the water pipes were unpredictable; the sink in the kitchen kept on spewing out brown muck. The refrigerator was out of order and no oven existed, leaving Heero to mostly bring back take-out.

Heero had stayed at the motel for almost two weeks, almost not daring to go out in fear of meeting either Hilde or Duo. He had bought enough food and supplies for a month, not knowing how long he would stay in this place. Money wasn't a problem; he had enough from his funds to survive for years; he had hardly spent any money that was sent to him from Doctor J or that he had hacked from OZ accounts.

Jerking up as he heard a knock on the door, Heero automatically reached his hand behind his back, searching for a gun that he hadn't carried for years. _'Old habits die hard,'_ he thought glumly while placing his back towards the wall next to the door. He didn't trust this neighborhood, so he wanted to be prepared for anything.

"Heero? Are you in there? It's Relena."

"Of course I didn't, Heero. Pagan is waiting outside and my bodyguard is just down the hall," Relena replied with a small smile and sat down on the well-used couch while looking around.

Heero closed the door and locked it securely before sitting down on the bed.

"This is... Nice..." Relena said after a while and smiled sheepishly.

"Don't try and pretty it up, Miss Relena. It's a dump and I know it." Getting to his feet, Heero picked up a plastic cup from his bag and filled it up with bottled water. "Sorry that I can't offer you anything better, but I've only brought in what's necessary for me to live on while I'm sorting out this mess." Blushing slightly as thumping against the wall from the room next to his started, Heero put up his normal stoic mask and mumbled. "And please excuse the noises... You get used to it after a while..."

Relena blushed too, but still let out a little giggle. "Well, I suppose a guy like you can get used to almost anything."

"Not everything," Heero deadpanned and handed Relena the cup. "I still hate to wear formal clothes."

Relena laughed and took a sip from the cup. "Heero Yuy, the comedian, and you say you don't have a sense of humor." Receiving a little glare from the Japanese teen, she laughed again and lowered the cup. "I'm sorry."

Heero nodded and sat back down on the bed, upper body hunched over and fingers entwined below his knees. "So... You are here now..."

Relena nodded. "So it would seem." Placing the cup onto the table in front of her, Relena folded her own hands in her lap and looked straight at Heero. "Now, as I understand it when we talked on the phone; you think you may have hurt Duo because you changed your mind about having sex with him."

Heero frowned a little. "You know, when you put it like that..."

Relena chuckled and smiled. "Forgive me. Now, I'm gonna sum up your situation as short as possible. You have been alone for two years before you had a desire to see Duo again, you know you love him as a friend, but you are unsure if those feelings run any deeper than that. Duo loves you, you want to love him, but you don't know if you can love him in return."

Heero nodded and mumbled. "Something like that, yes..."

Relena nodded. "As far as you've told me, you have picked up many ways to show interest and to see if you have stronger feelings for him, but they have only made you more confused. Correct?"

Heero nodded again.

Relena gently rubbed her chin and closed her eyes. "Well... If you have tried every trick in the book, then I don't know what I can do to help you."

Heero looked at her and murmured. "You're human, Relena... You know what it feels like to be... Well... In love... If you could just... Describe to me how it feels, then..."

Relena sighed and gave Heero a sad smile. "Heero... You are as human as anybody else... You... You just have to get back in touch with your feelings and I know I'm not the right person to help you with that... I may have claimed to be able to do that in the past, but I have grown up and matured... And when it comes to being in love... The feeling is different from person to person. I can't tell you how I feel when I'm in love because you may not feel the same way. Some people are floating on cloud nine, others have butterflies in their stomachs."

Heero nodded and looked down at his hands. "I see..."

Relena bit her lip and looked down for a second before looking back up at Heero. "Heero... How about you describe your feelings to me?"

Heero jerked his eyes up and stared at the woman in front of him. "But..."

Lifting her hand up, Relena silenced him. "Heero, I know you're confused about your feelings, but you can try and describe the feelings you're sure of. Just tell me what you feel when you're around him."

Heero nodded and bit his lip. "He... He makes me feel... happy... Like there isn't a thing in the world that I can't do. He... When he... when he looks at me... he makes my heart beat faster... and when he smiles... God that smile..." Sighing a little, Heero placed his head on his hands. "Relena... I... Everything I've heard and read says that what I feel are signs for love, but I have to be sure. I... I want to give him everything without a shred of doubt."

Relena got to her feet and gently kneeled down beside Heero while placing a hand on his shoulder. "But Heero... If what you feel are signs of love... and you know for sure that you don't want to hurt him, that you want to give him everything, what is making you so confused?"

Heero sighed and looked at Relena. "Because I basically feel the same way about you."

Relena gasped and felt a slight blush creep over her cheeks. "What do you mean?"

Heero sighed again and stared into the air. "I love you like a sister and there isn't a thing I wouldn't do for you. But I left because I felt it was time for you to stand on your own and you have managed well. When I see you smile, I am pleased and happy and when you support and believe in me... I feel like I can do anything, just like with Duo."

Relena smiled sadly and squeezed Heero's shoulder. "But I don't make your heart beat faster, do I?"

Heero shook his head. "No... Not in the same way..."

Relena nodded and moved her hand away from Heero's shoulder. Standing up, she moved to sit down next to Heero on the bed and placed her hands on his thigh. "Heero... I know this is going to sound so very stupid and I'm probably gonna regret it the second the words escape my mouth... But as you've been told before, a kiss is a good way to pass on feelings and better understand your own... You have already kissed Duo... Why don't you try and kiss me and compare those to emotions. If you feel a difference, then you will have your answer."

Heero looked at her, eyes slightly wide with shock. "Relena...?"

Relena blushed and moved her hands back into her own lap. "I know it was a bad idea. Forget that I said anything about it."

"It's worth a shot..."

"Huh?" Looking at the ex-Wing pilot, Relena felt her own eyes widen. "Heero?"

Looking seriously at the girl, Heero moved a little closer to her and covered her hands in his. "I said, it's worth a shot."

Moving his face closer to Relena's, he let his head tilt gently to the side, eyes open all the time. Relena felt her own eyes slide shut as her own head cocked to the side while moving towards the soldier's lips. She could feel Heero's breath on her lips and she couldn't help the sigh that escaped her lips. "Heero..."

Heero stopped, his lips mere inches away from Relena's. Then he softly whispered. "Relena... I have my answer... It won't be the same..."

The breath disappeared from her lips and Heero's face was gone from hers. As she opened her eyes, she watched as Heero disappeared out the door, shutting it softly after him. Sighing, she got to her feet and brushed her pants off. "Good bye, Heero... I hope you find happiness and peace in your heart soon... And I hope Duo will treat you well."

"Miss Darlian? Mister Yuy send me. Are you alright?"

Looking up as her bodyguard walked in the door with a worried look, Relena nodded and smiled. "I'm fine... and hopefully everything will sort itself out."

Nodding towards the door, Relena walked to her guard. "Come. Let's go back to earth. My business is done here." As she closed the door to the room, Relena sighed again and left one last thought to her prince of the stars.

_'There is an old saying that if you truly love someone, set them free... If they love you, they will come back to you... I set you free, but youwere never mine to begin with... You coming back to me doesn't mean you belong to me... It only means you care enough about me to come back... So go... find your true owner and love each other like you deserve... and always remember that you are loved.'_

---

A.C. 198, L2, Scrap Yard:

As soon as the phone rang Duo jumped with shock, sending the pen he'd been holding flying across the room with a yelp. He'd been so focused on the paperwork, thoughts of Heero gone for a moment that when the ringing suddenly filled the room, it scared him shitless. "Ye Gods!" he panted while clutching his chest.

"Duo, don't just sit there! Answer it!" Hilde peeked out from the kitchen and gave Duo a strict look.

"Yes, mum," Duo called back in a merry voice and unhooked the phone. "Maxwell and Schbeiker's Scrap Yard, how may I help you?"

Frowning a little as the screen remained blank, Duo waited patiently for someone to answer. He could hear someone breathing down the line as well as some background noises. Then the voice spoke up, making Duo's breath catch in his throat. "D-Duo?"

"H-Heero?"

"Yes... It's... It's me..."

Letting out his breath, Duo mentally thanked whatever god that was in charge that Heero was okay. Then he frowned and gave Heero a look of annoyance and hurt. "Where have you been, Heero? I've been worried sick about you!"

The line fell silent for a little while; the background noise was the only thing audiable, and Duo started to wonder if Heero had left the phone.

"I... I told you I would be back... And I've been thinking..."

"Thinking? Thinking about what! Heero, you promised me that you would stay and that we would talk about our situation, yet you high -tailed it away from me! Do you have any idea how that hurt, how I betrayed I felt?" Duo didn't mean to snap, but hearing Heero's voice on the line, talking a little quietly but still sounding normal, made him angry. He'd hoped he would at least be a little sorry. In the kitchen a mixer started, drowning out any other noise in the building.

"Listen..." Heero sighed, making the phone squeal and Duo had to pull the phone away from his ear. "Duo... I'm sorry that I left, but I... I couldn't stay. I had to think and be alone for a while."

"Well, you've been alone for a while now and you better have finished thinking."

Heero turned quiet again before speaking up. "Duo, I don't want to talk about this on the phone. It's... It's too personal and I want to see your face when I talk with you. You deserve at least that much after I left like that."

Duo sighed and nodded. "Fine, Heero. We'll talk. Where and when?"

"The park where we last talked at eight."

"Fine. And Heero? If you're not there... I'll wait thirty minutes tops, if you're not there then... Then don't bother calling or seeing me again."

"Deal. And if you're not there at eight... Then I'll keep waiting until you show up or call."

Duo smiled softly. "That's a deal."

The line went dead and Duo slowly hung up the phone. Placing his forehead against the wall, Duo sighed and wondered if he'd done something stupid, and if he wanted to hear Heero's reasons and answers.

"Who was it, Duo?" Hilde walked out from out of the kitchen, drying her hands on a towel.

Duo gave her a weak smile. "You didn't hear?"

Hilde shook her head and placed her hands on her hips. "No, the mixer drowned out everything, but I can see from the look on your face that Heero finally called. Hope you orally kicked his ass."

Duo shook his head and lifted it up from the wall. "I tried, but failed. He... He wants to talk with me so I'm meeting him at eight. I'm gonna listen to his reasons, hear his answers and decide from there what I'm gonna do."

Hilde nodded and looked up at the clock on the wall. "Well, you've got two hours on your sorry ass. Better decide now if ya wanna look nice for him or not; the walk over there takes at least half an hour."

Duo frowned. "I'm not walking, Hilde. I'm taking the car."

Hilde snorted and snatched up the car keys from the coffee table. "Fat chance, braid boy. Not at this hour. That car is the only driveable thing we have and if you take it, it'll be stripped before you're done with your beloved Hee-chan."

Duo pulled a face. "Sometimes I think you love that car more than you love me."

Hilde grinned and pocketed the keys. "And I do, my beloved brother."

Duo stuck out his tongue and crossed his arms. "Mean, mean, mean."

Hilde laughed and walked over to give Duo a kiss on the cheek. "I am just protecting what's rightfully mine."

Grinning, Duo pulled Hilde into a hug and ruffled up her hair. "I suppose I should be grateful, but would it kill you to be nice to me every once in a while?"

Hilde squirmed and laughed while trying her best to hit Duo with the towel. "Duo Maxwell, let me go! Our dinner's gonna get cold!"

"Oh, the magic word!" Duo let Hilde go and ran into the kitchen.

Hilde slowly followed while rubbing her scalp. "For someone who's depressed and suffering from a broken heart, you're sure in a merry mood."

Duo grinned and sat down at the table. "What can I say? Life's too short to be depressed."

Hilde just rolled her eyes. "Says the one who's been down for almost two weeks."

"Oh, shut up!"

---

Heero nodded as Duo agreed to meeting him and hung up. He'd done it. A flow of relief flooded over him and Heero felt like the weight of the world had just been lifted from his shoulders. Maybe there was still time to set things right between Duo and him. Now that he finally had his answer, maybe there was hope that he could salvage what was left of their friendship. He'd already hurt Duo once by leaving without a trace two years ago. He didn't want to do that to Duo again.

Glancing up as he heard the door shut, he watched out the window and saw Relena get into a white limousine and drive off. She had served her purpose and Heero knew that she didn't want to be in the way.

Walking over to the counter, Heero cleared his throat to get the girl's attention. "I would like to pay for the room now and inform you that I will be leaving today. Hopefully," he added softly under his breath and reached into his pocket to locate his wallet.

The girl nodded and handed Heero a pen and the book with his name in it. "Write the date and the time of you departure, sign and pay."

Heero nodded and did as told. "I'll stay until seven," he informed her and handed her the book.

The girl nodded and handed Heero a bill. "That's nice. Sign here."

Heero took the bill and signed before handing the girl some cash. "Keep the change," he mumbled and walked back to his room to pack his belongings. He didn't have much, after all, he'd left the scrap yard without bringing anything with him, but he had bought some clothes as well as the supplies.

After taking a quick shower, Heero dressed up in a new pair of jeans and a white shirt he'd picked up not too long ago. Running a hand through his hair, he wondered why he suddenly worried so much about his appearance. He normally didn't care what he dressed in or what he looked like, and he knew that Duo didn't care about that either. It was what was on the inside that mattered to them both, the heart, soul and mind of the person they were with. But it couldn't hurt to dress up just a little.

Cleaning up the room, Heero tried his best to kill some time before he had to go. The park where he and Duo had shared their past with each other was almost an hour's walk from the motel and Heero had no intention of taking a cab to the area. The chance of being mugged, or even killed, on the way was too big, and Heero had no intention of dying. Not anymore. Not after finally having a reason to live again.

After making up the bed, Heero sat down on the couch and stared up at the roof. What would he say when he met Duo again? He had his feelings sorted out; his emotions had never been more clear to him, but expressing them. That was a whole new ball game.

"Duo. I'm sorry I ran out on you the way I did, but I couldn't use you like that even though it was your idea. But I now know that I love you and I would like to try again." Listening as he tried to give his thoughts words, Heero sighed and shook his head. "Not good enough..."

Clearing his throat, he tried again. "Duo, I know I broke your trust by running away from the situation, but it was necessary for me to do that so I could come to a conclusion and... No, I'm talking myself away from the subject!" Shaking his head, Heero placed his head in his hands and murmured softy. "Duo... I ran because I was scared... Scared of my emotions, scared of the situation... You offered yourself to me freely, but I couldn't accept without knowing if the love I felt for you was the same love you felt for me. And now... Now I know it is... I love you..."

Looking between his fingers, Heero let a soft smile grace over his lips. "Maybe those words will work..." Then the smile disappeared as his mind calculated the chances of Duo forgiving him.

"One can always hope," he mumbled and let his eyes trail over to his wristwatch. It was almost seven. 'Time to go,' he thought to himself and got to his feet. After putting on his jacket, Heero grabbed his duffel bag and walking out the door, closing it behind him. Tossing the key onto the counter as he passed it, Heero opened the door and nodded to the girl. "Thank you for the room, miss."

The girl looked up and for the first time in the two weeks he'd stayed here, she flashed Heero a pretty smile. "Thank you, sir. It's been nice having you here, compared to the other company that normally comes here."

Heero gave her a small smile in return and nodded. "It's been a pleasure."

Then he walked out of the door and left the motel.

Meanwhile, Duo was busy figuring out what to wear, assisted by the not so helpful Hilde. "No need to give him your best, Duo, he doesn't deserve that. Go for something smart and simple."

Duo gave her a look and picked out one of his black shirts. "But I don't wanna dress up at all, Hilde. I mean, it's just Heero. He doesn't care about packaging, I could go in my pajamas and he wouldn't care less."

"He surely would raise an eyebrow at them," Hilde teased and patted Duo's back. "I'm telling you, show him how wonderfully sexy you are, show him just what he's risking to lose if he doesn't wake up," she added and picked out a nice, silk shirt.

Duo raised an eyebrow and looked at the girl. "Sexy? Hilde, I dunno, I don't really do sexy and-"

Hilde shut him up with a laugh. "You don't do sexy? Please, you're the very essence of sexy. You're sexy without trying! If I wasn't taken and you weren't gay, I would have been all over you."

Duo snorted and looked at the shirt. "But I still don't know, Hilde. Isn't it better to show of the natural beauty? That's what all those chick magazines say?"

"That's for girls to guys."

"Well, the same should go for one gay guy to another. Showing the natural side instead of the unnatural."

Hilde rubbed the back of her neck and shrugged. "Maybe so... Maybe you should save the sexiness 'til your first date or something?"

Duo sighed and grabbed his leather jacket. "And quite frankly, Hilde, I don't care. He'll just hafta take me as I am, dirty, black jeans, worn-out shirt, leather jacket and braid."

Hilde giggled and winked. "And only you can make that sexy."

"Would you stop with the sexy-thingie?" Duo barked and slipped the jacket on. "Anyway, I'm going now. Knowing Heero, he'll probably be at the park already. He's usually early or punctual. Might as well make him happy."

Hilde nodded and flashed him a smile as Duo walked to the front door. "Hey, Duo?"

Duo turned in the door as he yanked his braid out from inside his jacket. "What?"

Winking, Hilde gave him a thumbs up. "Good luck. Please bring home a new, Japanese boyfriend, okay?"

Duo smiled back as he let his hand rest on the door knob. "Thanks, Hilde. I'll try." Then he opened the door and walked out.

The air was chilly, but fresh and Duo took a deep breath to fill his lungs. The colony had shut down the wind that had blown over the area earlier, leaving the air clean from any pollution from the cars and factories.

Pulling his jacket tighter around his throat, Duo quickened his steps and hurried down the street. It was just after seven, but still crowds of people had started to gather outside the many clubs. Ignoring catcalls and whistles from both sexes, Duo concentrated on getting to the park as quickly as possible.

Stopping outside a store selling old movies and CD's from the twenty-first century, Duo stared at a screen showing an old version of "The Phantom of the Opera." Watching as the main characters Raoul and Christine danced and touched each other while singing, Duo sighed as he heard the soft and beautiful words coming from Raoul's mouth.

_/No more talk of darkness_

_Forget these wide eyed fears_

_I'm here, nothing can harm you _

_My words will warm and calm you._

_Let me be your freedom_

_Let daylight dry your tears_

_I'm here, with you, beside you_

_To guard you and to guide you./_

Sighing, Duo rested his forehead against the cool window and mouthed with Christine as she sang her love back to Raoul.

_/Say you love me every waking moment_

_Turn my head with talk of summertime_

_Say you need me with you now and always_

_Promise me that all you say is true_

_That's all I ask of you/_

"If only it was that easy," Duo mumbled and closed his eyes as Raoul and Christine kept on singing.

"Hey, gorgeous, want some fun?" A hand grasped his hand and Duo turned to look at the face of quite an attractive girl. Her face was covered in make-up, but it didn't hide her red and swollen eyes. Her face was young and Duo guessed that she was slightly younger than he was.

Giving her a polite smile, Duo removed her hand from his own. "Sorry, girl. I'm not out after any fun. I'm meeting someone."

The girl's eyes were almost pleading as she grabbed his arm. "Please, honey. I promise I'll be good. I'll do anything you want."

Frowning slightly, Duo jerked his arm away from her hand. "I'm sorry, but I'm not interested. I'm sure you'll find another client." Turning, Duo started walking away, but he didn't escape the sound of a low sob coming from the girl. Turning his head enough so he could see what was going on out the corner of his eye, he watched as the girl disappeared down an alley and into the dark. Sighing, Duo stopped and rubbed his neck. "Wonder why the fuck she was so desperate...?"

Sighing again, Duo started walking once more, but something in him refused to let him move. His legs simply wouldn't listen to him. "Dammit, Maxwell, you're simply too nice for your own damned good..." Checking his watch, Duo hoped that Heero had been serious when he said he would wait until Duo either showed up or called before turning to walk down the alley where the girl had disappeared.

"Hey! Hey, sweetheart! You down here?" He knew that calling for a whore was like offering to pay and take her, but he didn't care. All he wanted was to talk and see if her pride would let her take some cash as a gift.

"No, Allan! Please don't hurt me! I-I promise I'll get a c-customer, j-just give me some t-time!"

Suddenly hearing whimpers and pleads back down in the darkest corner of the alley made Duo jump to take cover in the darkness covering the wall. Sliding down the alley, making sure that he was hidden in the dark, Duo followed the sound of the pleads from the young girl. A loud crack from skin meeting skin filled the air, quickly followed by a loud cry.

"No, A-Allan, please!"

"Shut the fuck up, bitch!" Another loud crack was heard and more cries filled the air.

"P-please, give me more time!"

"I've given you more than enough time, Judith! I've given you over a month to get the cash you owe me; I've even paid your fucking crack bills and I'm fucking tired of waiting for you to pay me back!"

"No, please! I need more time! You'll get your money, just don't hurt me!"

"Oh, afraid that I'll mark your pretty skin? Don't worry about it, bitch! You're so fucking ugly that nobody's gonna pay to fuck you anyway! You're just trash on the streets!"

Duo clenched his fists as the argument continued and more slaps filled the air. The girl was crying and the sound went straight into Duo's heart. He'd spent his childhood watching young prostitutes selling themselves and he knew that the younger they were, the more desperate they were to get clients. Unfortunately pleading in such a way was a turn off to most of the perverts looking for a quick fuck, leaving the girls humiliated and money-less. This girl was obviously a newbie; the only reason she was doing this was to pay a crack-bill. Duo didn't like junkies, but he liked men hurting defenseless women even less. And his conscious prevented him from walking away from this. He respected the rules of the street too much to just walk away from a girl in need.

Choking back a snort, Duo quietly snuck up on the guy. _'I'm the fucking opposite of a knight in shining armor on his way to save a princess. I'm a madman on his way to save a crack-using__ whore. The irony of it all.'_

Allan didn't sense the teen that was quietly sneaking up behind him; he was too busy pressing the girl to the wall. "I've given you one too many chances, Judith," he hissed and raised his hand for another slap. "And now you're gonna get exactly what you deserve!"

"Didn't your mama ever teach you that it's not nice to harm girls?"

Spinning around in surprise, Allan didn't even register the fist that came his way, connecting hard with his jaw and knocking him off his feet. Groaning, he rubbed his cheek and glared up at the teen standing over him. The guy was tall and skinny, his hair collected into a ridiculously long braid that hung below the teen's buttocks. The guy didn't look like he could harm a fly. "Who the fuck are you?" he spat and got back to his feet.

Duo calmly rubbed his knuckles and gave Allan a cool look. "Who I am is none of your concern, buddy. I'm just here to save the damsel in distress." Giving Judith a warm smile, he held out a hand for her. "You alright?"

Judith nodded and reached out a shaky hand. She didn't normally trust strangers, but this guy said he was here to save her.

Duo reached out to take Judith's hand in his when Allan's hand shot out and smacked her hand away. "Don't you touch her, you faggot!"

Duo raised an eyebrow. "And why are you calling me a faggot?" Snorting, he wagged a finger in Allan's direction. "It's the hair, isn't it? It's always the hair. And even though I will concede you're right this time, it's not nice to just accuse people of things either. One day you'll end up in an alley with two broken legs because you haven't learned to control your anger or your lip. Ever considered going to anger management for it?"

Allan growled and lashed out at the braided clown, but the guy moved as smoothly as a cat, avoiding his blow and sending a hand straight into his neck, sending him to the ground. Allan moaned in pain as he hit the ground and placed a hand on his neck.

"Yup, definitely need to get that fixed, buddy. You'll score more easily with the ladies if you do. Or maybe you're into guys too. As they say about most things; It takes one to know one."

Something about that amused voice made Allan's blood boil; Who the fuck did that guy think he was, a clown! Getting back to his feet, Allan tried to lash out again, only to have his fist caught in the braided teen's hand. Feeling the hand around his fist tighten, Allan groaned as pain filled his still closed fist, his own nails were digging into the soft flesh of his palm. Then he was roughly spun around and was suddenly face-to-face with a brick wall. His arm was locked behind his back and he cried out in pain.

"Listen," a soft voice purred into his ear. "I'll be honest with you, buddy. I don't like people like you. Seeing girls being hurt by idiots and assholes like yourself tick me off. I'm not a fan of whores or junkies, but I've lived on the street myself and I know how tough it can be. I don't like it, but I respect the people that choose that path in their lives."

Spinning the guy around, Duo leaned his face so close to Allan's that their breath was mingling. "I'm gonna let you go now, and when I do I want to see you run as fast as you can down that alley and onto the street. I don't want to see you near that girl again. Understood?"

Allan nodded and sweated. The guy in front of him was short and looked like a kid, but the eyes seemed older than time itself, and there was a light in them that frightened him. Like death itself was living in that fragile looking body; a body that held a strength he'd never witnessed before. The second the braided guy let him go, he hightailed down the alley, Judith completely forgotten.

Duo snorted as he watched the guy flee down the alley before turning to the girl. "You alright?"

Judith nodded and slowly got up on shaky feet. She hadn't realized that she'd sat down during the mayhem. "Y-yes. I-I'm fine. T-thank y-you." Feeling her knees give in under her weight, she fell forward, only to be caught in the guy's arms.

"Whoa, easy there, girl!" Duo gently helped her down to the ground in a sitting position. "You've just had yourself a nasty shock, not to mention that you've been beaten. You need to rest a little. Don't worry, I'll stay with you until you can move, and then I'll help you back to wherever you live. Just don't invite me in or anything."

Judith nodded and gave Duo a quizzical look. "Thank you, but... Why are you helping me?"

Duo chuckled and smiled. "Guess it's kinda strange, huh? A total stranger helps a prostitute, that sure ain't something you see on the news." Patting her hand, Duo softly added. "Don't worry, I'm not out to gain anything from you because I know how hard it is out there. I grew up in this area. I guess you can say that I have respect for you and your kind. Just like I told that asshole of a wimp."

Judith smiled and Duo noticed just how beautiful she really was. Her tears had washed away some of the cheap make-up she'd been wearing and underneath was a pale, beautiful face. Kneeling down in front of her, Duo reached out a hand to brush away the tears and softly murmured. "You know... You don't have to do this... There's always another way..."

Judith pushed his hand away and pulled her knees up to her chin. "No, I don't... I have no education, have no job... Got tossed out by my parents... Got nowhere to go..."

Duo smiled and shrugged while standing up again. "So? I don't have an education either and I don't even know who my family is. Still, I've grown up, gotten myself a job and I'm quite satisfied my life. Your life is yours to deal with, you can do whatever you want. My view is, you make your day as you want it. If you think that this day's gonna be a piece of shit day, then it's gonna be a piece of shit day. If you think that the day can be good, then it will be a good day. It's all about how you think and what your outlook is. And don't say that you don't have any other way. There's always another way. You just have to find it."

Judith sniffed and looked at the strange guy with big, teary eyes. "R-really?"

Duo nodded and stuck his hand into his pocket. Pulling out his wallet, he thumbed out a few bills and handed them to the girl. "Here," he smiled. "This'll last you for a few days. I know the rules of the street and I know that you won't use it on junk. You'll save. So this'll last you for a few days until you get yourself a job. Don't give up and show your best qualities. I know that there are a few placed that need waitresses."

Judith stared and carefully accepted the money. "Th-thank you... But..."

Duo smiled and closed her hand around the bills. "Take it... Pretend I bought you for the night, paid you in advance before getting a erection problem and hightailed away from you without claiming the money back. You're a bright girl, you figure out an excuse. The money is yours to do with as you want. Just don't use it on crack."

Judith nodded and gave Duo a beautiful smile. "Thank you, sir. I... I don't know what to say..."

Duo smiled and cupped her cheek. "Thank you is more than enough."

Helping Judith back onto her feet, Duo carefully placed an arm around her waist after helping her get her own arm around his shoulder. Leading her slowly out of the alley, he chirped merrily. "I never got your name, miss. And forgive me when I say that I'd rather have my own name remain a secret."

Judith smiled. "Oh, that's not a problem. My name is Judith."

Duo smiled and nodded. "Very nice to meet you, Judith."

Passing the store he'd stopped at earlier, Duo listened as the last tones of "The Phantom of the Opera" died away and was replaced with some old music from the pre-colony times. Judith stopped and pressed her hands against the windows. "I love this store," she said softly. "They play nice music, so much better than the music we have now."

Duo smiled and nodded while looking into the store. "Yeah... The good stuff has already been used so it's hard to come up with something new."

Judith nodded and stroked her hand over the window. "I guess..." Giving Duo a bright smile, she pointed at a CD-player. "When I get enough money, I'm gonna get myself one of those. And I'm gonna get myself a nice apartment, nothing big because I don't need much space. And I'm gonna get a part time job and maybe even study."

Duo laughed and smiled. "You've certainly taken a quick turn for the better. What caused this change of mood?"

Judith smiled and squeezed Duo's arm. "Your smile. It has all the warmth and hope in the world in it." Studying Duo's face, she softly murmured. "You're a veteran, ain't you? From the wars?"

Duo nodded. "I am. But I was a survivor before I became a veteran."

Judith nodded. "I was still in the safety of my family during the war. I was tossed out onto the street because I started seeing a punk. He turned me into a junkie, and as soon as I was tossed out he left me. He'd only been seeing me for my money; my family was very rich you see."

Duo nodded again. "I understand. I hate people that take advantage of other people like that."

Judith sighed. "I was young and stupid. I still am, so I guess I have nothing to say..." Looking at Duo, she added. "You're not much older than me. I can tell. And yet, your eyes seems so old... And you have a burden in them, not just a happy glimmer." Gently cupping his cheek, she whispered. "You've got something heavy in your heart... Don't you..." It was a statement, not a question.

Duo sighed and shrugged. "I guess... But that's a little too personal to tell a stranger..."

Judith nodded. "I understand. I don't expect you to share something intimate with someone you've just met." Smiling, she gently patted Duo's arm. "But my guess is that you're in love, but the feelings ain't returned."

Giggling as her savior blushed a deep, crimson red, she winked. "I hit right on the bulls eye, didn't I?"

Duo nodded dumbly. "I... Well... Yeah... You did."

Judith giggled again and ran a hand though her hair. "I knew it because I felt the same way about that boy that made me toss my life away. I know what it's like to love, but not be loved back."

Duo looked at her, worried that he might had hurt her feelings. "Judith, I-"

"There he is!"

Jerking his head around, Duo spotted three angry men, led by the asshole he'd just chased away. "Fuck, what do they want?" he hissed while placing himself in front of Judith.

"They're friends of Allan," she whispered, her voice quivering with fear. "They've come to get me!"

"Not on my watch," Duo growled, mentally praying that Heero would forgive him for being late. His early stroll had suddenly made him very late for their meeting.

Taking a step towards the thugs, Duo threw his hands into the air. "Come on, you had to get your friends because you and I had a little fight? Sweetheart, communication problems are the number one reason why most relationships go to hell."

One of the thugs growled and pulled out a gun, aiming it right at Duo.

Duo winced and swallowed heavily. "Okay," he murmured softly to himself. "Another blooper from Captain Backfire. When will I ever learn to keep my mouth shut?"

Allan took a step towards Judith and held out his hand. "Come here, bitch. You're going home. Now!"

Judith whimpered and shivered while grabbing a hold of Duo's jacket. "No..." she whispered. "I don't wanna..."

Duo gently pushed her back, making her let go of his jacket. "And you won't... Step back, this could get messy..."

The thug waved his gun and yelled. "GIVE US THE BITCH! NOW!"

Duo growled and flashed forward quicker than the thug could react. Kicking the gun out of his hand, Duo sent it flying while he connected his elbow into the guy's face. Another guy grabbed his arms and lifted him up while the third raised his fist in a punch. Kicking out, Duo connected his foot with the guy's groin before sending his head back, smashing it with the guy that was holding him's jaw. As soon as the thug let go, Duo spun around and knocked the guy over.

Then he heard a gun shot, shortly followed by a jolting pain in his lower abdomen. Clenching his side, Duo spun around and stared at Allan, holding a smoking gun in his hands. Gurgling a little, Duo fell to his knees, feeling the blood trickle between his fingers. Lifting a hand to stare at the blood covering his hand, Duo let himself fall backwards until his back connected with a wall. He could hear several people scream in the distance and black spots where dancing in front of his eyes. For a second he saw Judith standing in front of him, but she vanished as soon as he blinked his eyes. He could hear someone calling for someone to call for an ambulance and almost as a background music, he could hear the sad lyrics from an old pre-colony song play.

_/Fare thee well, little broken heart_

_Downcast eyes, lifetime loneliness_

_Whatever walks in my heart will walk alone_

_Constant longing for the perfect soul_

_Unwashed scenery forever gone_

_Whatever walks in my heart will walk alone_

_No love left in me_

_No eyes to see the heaven beside me_

_My time is yet to come_

_So I'll be forever yours/_

Closing his eyes, Duo let a soft smile grace over his lips. _'Guess my time has come now... Too bad... I never got to say good bye... But I might as well leave the world the same way I came into it... Without a trace...'_

Feeling strong arms pull him up, Duo forced his eyes open and tried to see who was trying to help him. His vision was blurry, he had no chance to make out the person's face. But before he let himself sink into darkness, he spotted a blurry mass of chocolate brown over a golden colored oval that was probably a face. Letting his eyes slide shut, he let one name pass over his lips. "Heero..."

Then everything went dark.

---

Checking his watch for had to be the tenth time in fifteen minutes, Heero waited for Duo with a little knot of worry forming in his stomach. Duo was almost half an hour late and Heero hadn't heard anything from him. He was starting to get really worried. _'No matter how pissed he might be at me, Duo wouldn't lie. He said he would show up and he will. He' probably just trying to unsettle me. You promised him you would wait and wait you will.'_

Sighing, Heero pulled the jacket tighter around his throat, trying his best to ignore the wind that suddenly started up. He wasn't cold, but the thought of Duo being late was sending a chill down his spine. _'What if something has happened to him?'_

"And when the fuck did you become his nanny? Snap out of it, Yuy! Just because you've figured out that you love the guy doesn't mean he needs your protection any more than he did before. He's more than capable of taking care of himself," he snarled to the 'mother hen' voice that had suddenly showed up in his head and shoved his hands roughly into his pockets. "He'll be here, he's probably just gotten distracted by something." His poor attempt at soothing himself wasn't working and Heero checked his watch again.

20:25.

The clock was ticking. Duo was getting later and later. The knot of worry in Heero's stomach was getting bigger and bigger, and the voice in his head that he didn't know he had kept on screaming that Duo was in trouble and needed his help.

Letting out a little growl, Heero started walking towards the exit and decided to go the route Duo probably would take when walking from the yard to the park. If he was lucky, he would bump into Duo on the way, squeeze that pestering voice in his head, get a verbal bashing from Duo and be back at the scrap yard for the same treatment from Hilde by ten. If he was lucky, they all would be going to bed as friends and Heero would never have to sleep alone again, even though the last thing was a little bit too much to hope for.

Picking up the pace, Heero hurried down the streets and past the many clubs, watching the different people that were trying to either get into the clubs or get his attention. He didn't get it, why was everybody noticing him. "Maybe it's because you're stupid enough to go out alone on L2," he mumbled bitterly to himself and remembered that every time he'd walked around with Duo after a hard days work, nobody called after them; except the occasional whore or drunk.

Hearing the sound of sirens in the distance, Heero half wondered which poor idiot had taken an overdose of drugs or where the latest burglary had taken place before letting the thought slide out of his head. Rounding a corner, Heero looked up as a police car rushed past him, following an ambulance far ahead of it.

Feeling the knot in his stomach tighten further, Heero tried to push any thoughts of a possibly wounded Duo out of his head. L2 was known for it's high hospital rate; it could have been anybody that was hurt or whatever the problem was. It didn't necessarily have to be the jokester of L2 that was wounded.

Hearing shouts and screams in the distance, Heero started jogging lightly towards the noise. Something was obviously going on and maybe he could help.

Seeing a guy running full speed towards him, obviously trying to escape from the mayhem in front of him, Heero guessed that whatever the mess was, this guy had something to do with it. Relying on his old soldier reflexes, Heero started running full speed towards the guy, grabbing him around the waist and tackling him brutally to the ground. Slamming his face into the concrete, Heero used his other hand to lock the guy's arms to his back and held him down. Looking up as he spotted the cops come running, Heero made sure that the guy under him was calm, tightening the grip on his arms painfully every time he squirmed.

Getting up as the police took over, Heero brushed some dust from his pants before running a hand through his hair. "What's going on?"

A police officer, a young woman, probably in her thirties Heero guessed, cuffed the guy and sighed. "We're not sure what caused this mess, but obviously this guy started it all. He shot a young man trying to protect a girl for reasons we don't know yet."

"The fucking faggot tried to take away what's mine!" the guy spat and started to squirm, the woman tightened the cuffs around his wrist, earning a groan of pain from him.

"Shut up! You can say everything we wanna know in jail," she hissed before looking at Heero. "We thank you for your help, sir, but we would like to ask you that you stay away from the area ahead. We don't need more panicked people there. It's enough that the girl doesn't want to let go of that poor boy's braid and-"

"What!" Feeling his eyes widen, Heero grabbed the collar of the policewoman's jacket. "What did you say?"

Letting her partner take over the cuffed man, the police woman tried to release Heero's hands form the collar of her uniform. "Sir, I would like for you to let go of my uniform as this can be looked upon as assaulting a police officer and-"

"I don't fucking care! The guy that was shot down! What did he look like!"

The police woman started to shiver; the intensity and flames in the teen's eyes were frightening her. "He was about your height, sir, with a long, chestnut brown braid and a heart shaped face. I can't really give you any more information, it's too-"

The teen suddenly let go of her collar and ran straight towards the scene of the crime. "Sir, wait! You're not allowed to go there!"

Heero ignored the police woman's call and kept on running. His worst fears had just become a reality. Duo was wounded, shut down because he'd tried to protect some girl he probably didn't even know.

Preparing himself for the worst, Heero broke his way through the mass of people; but the sight of Duo, lying in the middle of the street, blood gushing out between the fingers of his right hand because of a gunshot wound in his lower abdomen was to much. He could feel his eyes widen again and his breath caught in his throat while the knot of worry in his stomach turned into a massive wave of nausea. He'd seen wounded, dead, even badly mangled people many times during the war without flinching, but the sight of Duo, his best friend, lying like that on the hard concrete of the streets made him want to double over and throw up.

A girl was clutching his braid, sobbing heavily and slapping away hands that reached out to either help her or remove her so they could help Duo. Kneeling down beside her, Heero reached out a shaky hand to brush through his bangs. The girl sniffed heavily and looked at him. "D-do you know him?"

Heero nodded and let his hand run over Duo's cheek. "He was... Is... My best friend."

Seeing the longing in the teen's eyes, Judith carefully let go of Duo's braid and moved away. "Take care of him," she whispered and finally let some person from the ambulance help her up and wrap a blanket around her shoulders. "He's an angel and he needs light."

Heero stared at the girl before nodding firmly. Placing his hands by the nape of Duo's neck and back, Heero lifted the braided teen up from the ground and into his arms. Noticing a small flicker in Duo's eyes, almost as if the eyes opened and closed, made Heero remember the urgency of the situation and he yelled out. "Everybody move! He needs medical treatment now!" As he rushed towards the ambulance, Heero failed to hear the word that softly came from Duo's lips.

Everything was a blur after that. Heero remembered identifying Duo while watching them put him on life support before driving him to the hospital, leaving Heero too scared and angry to answer questions. Every time he answered, he asked if he could follow his friend to the hospital, only to be ignored and asked another question.

After what must have been an eternity, he had to give phone numbers so they could notify Duo's family, but Heero could remember that he'd whispered that Duo had no family other than Heero nearby.

Hilde was called since they found the number to the scrap yard in Duo's wallet and Heero remembered her terrified and shocked face as she came to pick him up so they could both go to the hospital. Then he was in the car, Hilde bombarding him with questions, but if he answered any of them he didn't recall doing so. He had just closed his eyes and leaned back into the seat. After that, his mind went blank.

When Heero opened his eyes, he was surrounded by white walls and buzzing voices. Rubbing his eyes, he sat up in a very uncomfortable chair and looked around. Then everything came flooding back. Jerking his eyes open completely, Heero bolted up from the chair, only to be pushed back down by a very tired looking Hilde.

"Don't bother," she croaked out and sat down next to him. "The doctors ain't answering any questions yet..."

Heero obediently nodded and stared at the wall in front of him. "Is... The condition...?"

"Yes."

Heero stared at Hilde, but she was staring at the floor. "... Oh..." He hadn't expected her to be so blunt about it.

"I have contacted the other pilots," she continued, still not looking at Heero. "Quatre and Trowa are on their way, they'll be here in a few hours. Wufei can't come for a few days."

Heero nodded and folded his hands together. After a while in silence, watching doctors and nurses run past them in hurry, Heero placed one hand over Hilde's and squeezed it. "Thank you... For... For everything... For... For picking me up... For calling the guys... For..."

Hilde lifted her other hand. "Enough, Heero..."

Heero looked at her and for the first time since they'd arrived at the hospital, she looked him straight in the eyes. Her own were red and swollen, silvery trails from tears were still visible on her cheeks.

"Enough," she repeated and lowered her hand to cover Heero's. "Heero... No matter how mad I am at you... And no matter how much I want to blame this on you because you chose to call him today, making him go out there and save that girl only to get shot; I can't..."

Watching as heavy streams of tears started to trail down her cheeks, Heero carefully reached out his hand to dry away the tears. Her words stung, but he knew that she didn't mean to hurt him or make him feel guilty.

Hilde let out a loud sob and buried herself in Heero's arms. "He... he was so happy when you called him... He just... he wanted to be mad at you, but... God, Heero, what if he dies!"

"He won't die," Heero murmured quietly while gently stroking Hilde's back. He wasn't used to dealing with hysterical women, but he owed the woman enough to at least try and offer some comfort. "He was a survivor before he became a pilot... He's survived two wars and a personal hell... He won't let some gunshot wound kill him... Not before he's kicked my ass royally like I deserve..."

Hilde snorted a little, but it was soon replaced by hiccups.

Heero continued to gently stroke her back, whispering quiet words to both calm himself and the girl down. Every now and then a doctor would come and ask a question, but nobody stayed long enough for Heero or Hilde to ask questions of their own.

Time slowly passed and after what seemed like an eternity, Hilde fell asleep in Heero's arms. Heero let her stay there for a while, but when his arms started to tire, he lifted her up and placed her gently on a couch before sitting down next to her on a chair.

Hours ticked by and more nurses passed by, but still no information was given on Duo's condition. The doctors refused to say anything to Heero since he wasn't family. Heero wanted to say that he was his lover or boyfriend, but since he had no documentation to prove it, it wouldn't help, even if he did know what blood-type Duo was, what he was allergic to and what kind of medication he could take safely without getting side-effects. Because he was nothing more than a friend, he had no right to anything.

He started to pace in the halls, making frequent visits to the coffee machine so he could stay awake until he knew Duo's status. He snapped at nurses that asked him to sit down because he was disturbing the other visitors and almost managed to get himself tossed out, but after promising he would behave, he was left alone. Hilde was still sleeping on the couch.

An eternity passed before a doctor finally approached the duo while removing the mask covering his mouth. "Heero Yuy and Hilde Schbeiker?"

Heero jumped up and nodded. "That's us."

The doctor nodded and removed the gloves from his hands. He was a middle aged man; he'd seen just about everything life had to offer in the trauma department. He'd been a doctor during the two wars and ten years before they even had started. He had been a trainee when the legendary colony leader Heero Yuy had been assassinated; he'd been one of the few that had been there when the forensics lab had looked over the body. "You were listed on Mr. Maxwell's medical forms as his next of kin and you informed us that you were his closest, living family, correct?"

Heero nodded again. "We are... We... Fought together during the war... We're..."

The doctor nodded. "I understand, Mr. Yuy. We have some information about Mr. Maxwell's condition."

Heero nodded. "Let me hear, but... But please... Don't wake her up... I'll... I'll inform her later... She needs the rest."

The doctor nodded. "As you wish." Walking towards a more private area, the doctor motioned for Heero to follow him. Waving towards a chair, the doctor waited for Heero to sit down before speaking. "Mr. Yuy," he started, only to be interrupted by one very frightened looking Japanese.

"Listen. Don't go beating around the bush here. Give me everything as it is."

The doctor nodded again. "I have no intention of doing anything else, Mr. Yuy." Clearing his throat, the doctor gave Heero the cold facts. "Mr. Maxwell is out of danger at the moment, but we were worried for a while there. The bullet entered his body through his abdomen and grazed a kidney before exiting through his back. The kidney has had to be removed, he will do just fine with only one."

Heero nodded, but the knot in his stomach refused to ease up. "I see... Is there... Anything else?"

The doctor nodded. "The bullet went through his spine and cut a few nerves as it went. We managed to stitch them together, but there is a possibility that he will never walk again. He might be wheelchair bound for the rest of his life. Only when he wakes up will we know for sure."

Heero nodded and swallowed. A life in a wheelchair. For someone as active as Duo, life in a wheelchair would be a tremendous disaster; he knew personally that if he'd been the one in this situation, he would rather die. The two of them had always relied on their bodies, not used to it letting them down. This would be hard for Duo to accept.

"We have some of the best physical therapists in this hospital. I have complete faith in their abilities," the doctor said reassuringly. "As soon as he wakes up we will tell him the extent of his injuries, and with his authorization, I will have a notice sent to them on Mr. Maxwell's case so they can prepare themselves for any visits he may like to schedule with them."

Getting onto his feet, Heero stated. "If possible, I want the full legal rights and a say in the treatment he will go through. I am listed as his next of kin in his medical records and even though it's from the time of war, it should still be good."

The doctor looked a little uncertain. "Unless you are family, you don't really have much say in Mr. Maxwell's treatment."

Heero gave him an icy glare and growled quietly while clenching his hands together so tight that his nails were digging into his palms. "Neither Duo nor myself have any family; we have always relied on each other in these matters. We have spent two wars watching each others back's and patching each other up when needed, now shouldn't be any different." Unclenching his fists, Heero suddenly remembered how he'd just violated Duo's trust in him and added quietly. "I owe him this much... I owe it to him to show him that he can trust me again..."

The doctor watched as the young man in front of him suddenly shrank in on himself. The calm and dangerous aura that had been around him just seconds ago suddenly vanished, leaving a scared and lost little boy in front his eyes. A young man, a soldier that looked like he was going to crumble at any second, yet was willing to carry the load of the world on his shoulders all by himself. This devotion, this caring towards the young man he'd just operated on, meant only one thing to the doctor. He had seen just about everything at this hospital; families with relieved faces when he'd told them everything was gong to be alright, people who'd cracked in front of him because someone they cared about had died. But this was the first time he'd met such a scared, yet devoted man.

"Mr. Yuy..."

Heero looked up, hands folded together tightly in a desperate bid to try to make them stop shaking. "Yes?"

A sad smile had appeared on the man's lips as he commented, "I've seen that team perform miracles, Mr. Yuy. If there is any chance they can help Mr. Maxwell walk again, they'll make it happen. While it's too soon to say if there will be anything they can do, we won't know unless we try. Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst."

Heero smiled weakly and got onto his feet. "Thank you, doctor..."

Gently grabbing Heero's shoulder, the doctor continued. "I'll take you to him. He's scheduled to wake up in a few hours, I think he'll be pleased if you were the first thing he sees when he does. After all, you have the right to see him. You are his next of kin."

Heero's lips curved into a bigger smile than earlier and nodded. "I... I appreciate it..."

The doctor winked and started leading Heero down the hall. "It's no problem... I'm sure you won't be getting in the doctor's way."

Heero nodded while following the doctor down the hall. "I won't."

Showing Heero the door to Duo's room, the doctor added softly. "I will notify your lady friend about Mr. Maxwell as soon as she wakes up and then send her down here."

Heero nodded and looked at the door to Duo's room. "Could you..." he asked softly and glanced over at the man. "In a few hours Quatre Raberba Winner will show up at the hospital, most likely followed by Trowa Barton. Could you... Please show them here?"

The doctor nodded. "Of course." Then he left Heero's side and walked back up the hall they'd just walked down. Heero remained outside of the door, afraid to open it. Afraid of what he might see.

Taking a deep breath, he slowly placed his hand on the knob and twisted it. Keeping it like that for a while, he tried his best to gather up his courage to actually walk inside. After what seemed like forever, Heero finally pushed the door open and stepped inside, keeping his eyes firmly on the ground as he went. Turning to close the door behind him, he took a deep breath and turned back around. Slowly looking up, he could feel his heart racing as he saw what he'd never wanted to see.

Duo was lying on the hospital bed, hooked up to a temporary respirator to help him breathe. He had a tube down his throat to suck up saliva and a heart monitor was fastened to his finger. His hair was still in a braid, but hair was sticking out everywhere. All in all it didn't look too bad, but to Heero it was like a nightmare.

Looking up at the screen that showed Duo's heart rate, he watched as the little green dot went up and down, uttering a beep every third second or so. It had a strange, calming feeling to it; it was showing that Duo's heart was pumping normally, proving that he was alive.

Heero found a chair and dragged it over to Duo's bed and sat down. Stroking Duo's bangs, he whispered softly. "Hey there, buddy... It's... It's me... Heero... You poor lowlife of a friend..."

Swallowing, Heero kept his hand against Duo's forehead, feeling the warmth coming from him. "I... I'm sorry I got you into this... I... I waited in the park like we agreed, but... I left to find you... And I found you like this... I... I didn't mean for it to end like this..."

"It's not like it's your fault, Heero..."

Looking up, Heero spotted Hilde by the door, looking a little better than before. She stepped into the room after closing the door behind her and grabbed a chair of her own. Sitting down next to Heero, she looked at him with worried eyes. "The doctor has informed me about the surgery and that he has a fifty-fifty chance of being confined to a wheelchair. I woke up a few seconds after you left with that other doctor."

"I see..." Looking down at the pale boy, Heero quietly asked. "He has a fifty percent chance?"

Hilde nodded. "Yes. Didn't the doctor tell you?"

Heero shook his head and moved his hand away from Duo's forehead to let it trail down a red-cheeked, but pale face.

Hilde gently grabbed Duo's hand and squeezed it. "Heero... It's like I told you earlier... It's not your fault, no one is blaming you. I'm certainly not and I know Duo won't either."

Heero sighed and removed his hand from Duo's face. "But when you think about it... It was my fault... If I hadn't been so stupid, if I'd just figured out my feelings sooner... If I'd only told him that... That..."

"That you love him back?"

Heero nodded. "Yeah..." Sighing, Heero looked at the dark-haired woman next to him. "I... I'll probably sound like an idiot here, but... I have never... Felt something like this for anyone before and I've never said those words... So the first time I say it..."

Hilde smiled tenderly and moved her hand away from Duo's and gently cupped Heero's cheek. "You want to tell him when you can be sure he can hear you... Right?"

Heero nodded. "Yes..." Giving her a quizzical look, Heero asked. "How do you know that?"

Hilde chuckled and smiled. "Please, Heero, I can read it on your face. It's written there with big, shiny letters. You might as well get a neon-sign where it says 'Heero Yuy loves Duo Maxwell!' on it."

Heero chuckled a little, but it quickly died, leaving only a pair of sad eyes on a stoic mask.

Hilde looked over at Duo's still sleeping form and murmured. "I'll leave you two alone..."

Heero looked up with a raised eyebrow. "Hilde?"

Hilde smiled and winked. "I think you have more stuff in your heart that you need to get out. You don't need me here to make you embarrassed."

Heero smiled and nodded. "Thank you, Hilde..."

Hilde just winked and blew him a kiss before leaving the room. Heero returned his gaze to Duo's sleeping form, but now he didn't say anything. He just stared at Duo, hoping that maybe the braided man would open his eyes, grin and say "Fooled ya!" in that sing-song voice of his. He craved that Duo would wake up and say that it was all a joke, but it didn't happen. Duo remained sleeping, not moving a muscle. It almost looked like he was dead, had it not been for the beep that came from the heart monitor one would have thought he was.

After a few hours two nurses came in and removed the mask and the tube from Duo's face and throat. After checking his blood-pressure, heart rate and breathing pattern, they left the room, leaving Heero alone without so much as a question.

A few more hours passed by and Heero could feel that sleep was finally getting the best of him. Not wanting to leave Duo's side, Heero simply leaned his head against Duo's hand and closed his eyes, telling himself he just needed a few minutes. He would only shut them for a few moments, just for a little while, then he would sit up, continue to watch Duo and wait for him to wake up.

But when he felt darkness creep over him as soon as his eyes closed, Heero didn't chase it away, he welcomed it with open arms, hoping that when he woke up, he would realize that it was all just a bad dream. Nothing of this would have happened. He would be in bed at the "Blue Peach", listening to the whores knocking on the doors and the occasional thud from people fucking in the room next door, wondering where he could run of to or if he should crawl on his knees back to Duo and plead for another chance.

The now distant beeping from the monitor next to the bed carefully soothed him into a dreamless, yet safe state of sleep, knowing that when he woke up everything would be okay. Just before darkness claimed him, Heero could swear he heard the door to the room open and close, and footsteps come closer to the bed. He could feel a pair of hands cover him with a stiff, itchy blanket, but he didn't care. The secure feeling of having the blanket around his shoulders only made him sleepier and before long he was asleep.

When he finally woke up, Heero didn't know how long he'd been sleeping. He couldn't remember. All he knew was that he could have slept longer, but something was lightly stroking his cheek.

Opening his eyes, Heero carefully blinked a few times so his eyes could adjust to the light in the room before he lifted his head and stared straight into a pair of tired, yet amused Cobalt blue eyes. "Thought you'd never wake up," a hoarse voice whispered and a small smile curved around the lips that had spoken the words.

"Duo..." Heero stared for a second, then jumped up and tightly hugged Duo's upper body close to his chest, ignoring that the blanket that had been around his shoulders as it fell to the ground. A small moan made him let go and almost jump back down into his seat.

Duo coughed a little and slumped back down into a sitting position. Apparently someone had been inside the room while Heero had slept and helped Duo to sit when he woke up.

Heero blushed a little and looked down. "Sorry... I... I'm just so relieved to see that you're safe..."

Duo smiled and lifted his hand to pat Heero's now folded hands. "It's okay, Hee-chan. I'm glad that you were worried about me. Shows me that you care at least a little bit. Smiling sheepishly, Duo pulled his hand back and ran it through his bangs instead. "Sorry that I was so late to our meeting by the way. I didn't mean to make you wait."

Heero shook his head and gave him a weak smile. "Don't use up your strength on apologizing to me, Duo... I'm the one who should say I'm sorry anyway."

Duo shook his head. "Nah, I understand your reasons," he croaked out and brought up a hand to gently soothe his sore throat. "But I will admit that I was pretty hurt and pissed when you left and that I wanted to blame you for all my misery. But I've been awake for a few hours now, I've been thinking while watching you sleep and I've come to the conclusion that you can't be blamed for any of this. And before you ask, I've been checked up on at least four times, had some antibiotics for my throat, I've rested, had my bandages changed and my stitches checked, and I'm completely fine."

Heero sighed, then gave Duo a quizzical look. "Not trying to avoid the subject, but how long have I been sleeping?"

Duo glanced up at the clock on the wall. "Well, I've been awake for about six hours, but Quatre stopped by and told me he wrapped you in a blanket about two hours before I woke up, so I guess you've been asleep for at least eight hours."

Heero's eyes widened a little. "Eight hours?"

Duo nodded. "Guess you needed it. Quat said he'd talked to the doctor and the doc had said you've been awake since I got here and that's a good twenty-four hours since."

Heero nodded, then asked. "So, Quatre's here?"

Duo nodded again. "He's here, alright. Both he and Tro are. I dunno where they are right now, but they stopped by the room about an hour ago, so they can't be too far away."

"And Hilde?"

Duo sighed and the little smile suddenly fell from his lips. "Yeah, Hilde's been here too..."

Heero quietly got up from the chair and sat back down onto Duo's bed. Taking Duo's hands in his, he gently whispered. "I assume... She has told you everything..."

Duo nodded. "Yeah... That I have a fifty-fifty chance to be chained to a wheelchair for the rest of my life."

Heero gently squeezed Duo's hand and whispered. "It's better than nothing."

"Maybe not," Duo croaked back, then put up a brave, yet sad smile. "But you know that every time you have a fifty-fifty chance, you have a ninety percent chance that you'll get the bad end of it. And to tell you the truth, I can't really feel my legs... They're all numb..."

Heero snorted, but his face remained serious. "We'll just have to think positive then and do our best."

Duo raised an eyebrow. "We?"

Heero nodded and gently cupped Duo's cheek. "I have... I was listed as your next of kin on your medical forms and I've asked if I can have all the legal rights for your treatment. I have asked to get the best physical therapist that this colony, or any colony for that matter, can offer. I will make sure that you walk again, and I will take care of you as long as you need it."

Duo gaped for a moment, the quietly asked. "So... You've asked if you can take care of me?"

Heero nodded and looked down, unable to meet Duo's intense gaze. He felt he wasn't worthy of looking Duo in the eyes. "Yes... I... I want to prove that you can trust me again, that..." Sighing heavily, Heero studied the hand he was covering with his own and whispered. "I am sorry that I bailed out on you... I know that we agreed that whatever happened between us, we would talk about it and reach an agreement... I... I misused your trust, I left without so much as explaining my reasons and I know I hurt you deeply..."

Duo looked at him and gently whispered. "Heero... Look me in the eyes and tell me your reasons... Then I will judge you from there."

Heero nodded and took a deep breath. Slowly he looked up and stared into Duo's warm pools of blue, seeing only warmth and friendship in them. He could feel his throat close up; dealing with emotions wasn't easy for him, but he wanted every card on the table. He owed Duo that much of a gift if he ever wanted to gain Duo's trust again.

"I... I wanted what we did, Duo... I really wanted to be with you, wanted to touch every part of you and please you... But the thought of what we were doing was lurking in the back of my mind. I... I just couldn't use you in such a way, just to find out what I was feeling." Lifting his hand as Duo tried to speak, Heero continued. "I know you were the one offering, but you did it out of love. I... I just couldn't be with you like that unless I knew if I felt the same way. No matter what we would have come up with after the night, you would have been hurt emotionally. Because the situation wouldn't have been created out of mutual love... And I... I just couldn't use you, couldn't harm you in such a way. I love you to much as my best friend to do that to you... So I fled the scene to try and figure it out on my own..."

Duo looked deeply into Heero's eyes and saw the vulnerability; the insecurity and honesty in the Prussian blue and he knew that Heero was opening all of his heart for Duo to read. Feeling a lump gather in his throat, Duo carefully asked. "And... Did you come up with something?"

Heero nodded. "Yes... I found my answer..."

Duo tried to sit up straighter, a difficulty when it felt like his legs were asleep, and was about to open his mouth when a soft knock on the door interrupted him. Both teens turned their heads to look as the door opened and a doctor carrying a chart in his hands came in. He was young, yet older than Heero and Duo were, had thick, short brown hair and thin framed glasses. "How are you feeling, Mr. Maxwell?"

Duo smiled and stretched his arms into the air while Heero moved away from the bed to sit back down into the chair next to it. "Fine," he chirped and leaned back into the soft pillow. "I'm feeling perfectly fine. A nurse's been here and checked the wounds, I've rested, my throat isn't itching so badly anymore and I feel ready to do the tango. Well, I could, but my legs feel numb."

The doctor nodded and scribbled something down onto the chart. "So you can't feel your legs at all?"

Duo shrugged and got a sheepish look on his face. "I... I dunno. I'm not sure how to feel them..."

The doctor gave him a friendly smile and stepped over to the foot end of the bed. Lifting up the blanket he uncovered Duo's legs and looked at them. "Well, we'll see if we can't get some sort of reaction from them." Looking up from his position at Duo's feet, the doctor smiled and introduced himself. "My name is Doctor Jamie Salvage, I'm a physical therapist, the best this colony has to offer they say. I will have a look and try a few methods to get some sort of reaction from your feet, and if I can't do it, we will call in some doctors from L4 and Earth. Mr. Winner has already told us he will pay for any and all costs of your treatment so don't worry about that."

Duo just gaped before leaning deeply back onto his pillow with crossed arms. "Well, that's just typical Quatre "Mother hen" Raberba Winner. Bet he'd also offer to wipe my ass while I'm in a wheelchair, or worse, have a few Maguanacs ready with paper."

Heero just smiled before looking over at Doctor Salvage. "So, what is the plan for Duo's treatment?"

Doctor Salvage made a few notes before pushing his glasses further up his nose. "Well, first I want to do a few simple test to get a reaction from his feet; pinching him, tickling him with either the backside of a pen or with a feather, anything that might get a reaction from him. If he responds, we will start teaching him to walk again, using a very simple walking program. But either way, it will take time."

Heero nodded and looked at Duo. "I will be with him every step on the way, helping him as much as I can."

Doctor Salvage smiled and fished a pen from the front pocket of his long, white coat. "Shall we start? I will now brush the end of my pen over the soles of your feet, Mr. Maxwell. Please tell me if you can feel anything."

Duo nodded and closed his eyes in concentration.

Doctor Salvage gently ran the end of the pen over the sole of Duo's left foot, tickled him between the toes and poked it at his heel. "Do you feel anything?"

Duo frowned in concentration, willing himself to feel, but sighed and shook his head. "No... I can't feel a thing..."

Doctor Salvage continued to run the pen over Duo's foot. "Are you sure? Try and wiggle your toes for me."

Duo did as the doctor requested, but wasn't able to. He wanted to move his toes, wanted to feel the pen over his foot, but he couldn't. "I'm sorry, doc," he mumbled with defeat in his voice and sighed. "I can't feel a thing..."

Heero could clearly see the defeat and sadness in Duo's eyes and gently murmured. "Duo, don't give up. If you just try a little harder, will yourself to feel, than maybe-"

"Heero, I can't feel it!" Duo barked out and big tears started to gather in the braided man's eyes. "I can't feel my legs, I can't move my toes. Heero, I'm paralyzed, I know I am!"

Heero frowned and grabbed Duo's chin between his thumb and fingers and stared him in the eyes. "Duo, don't you dare to give up like that. That's not like you. There is always a chance that everything will turn for the better."

Duo stared at Heero and whispered with a hoarse voice. "Heero... I tried, but I couldn't... I'll just have to face it, I'll be bound to a wheelchair for the rest of my life and- OW!" Glaring at the doctor, who currently had Duo's little toe in a grip between his fingers, he yelled. "What the heck did you pinch me for!"

The doctor smiled and released Duo's toe. "Did you feel it?"

"Of course I felt it! It hurt!"

Doctor Salvage smiled and wrote something down on the chart. "Then I will notify the therapist that your training can start next week."

Duo blinked. "Huh?"

Heero rolled his eyes and cupped Duo's cheek. "Duo... You felt the doctors pinch. He pinched your toe, which happens to be a part of the foot you believe is paralyzed, and you felt it; meaning?"

Duo's face broke out in a small, yet happy smile. "That I'm not paralyzed!" Looking over at Doctor Salvage, Duo asked carefully. "But doc... I couldn't feel the pen or anything else. How come I could feel that pinch?"

Doctor Salvage smiled and wiggled his finger in the air. "The human mind, Mr. Maxwell, is a very complex thing and the human will is very strong. If you believe in something strongly enough, the human will can make it happen. Sometimes we deal with patients after surgery that complain that they are in a lot of pain. We sometimes give them sugar pills, saying that they are very strong painkillers that will remove the pain instantly. Believing what they are told, the human mind removes the pain itself. That is probably the case with you too."

Heero rubbed his chin and murmured. "I see. Duo tried so hard to make his feet feel and move, but there was still a part of him that wondered what the point was. He believed deep inside that he would never walk again, and the human mind made it so."

The doctor nodded. "Exactly. But by doing something to get a reaction without him knowing, I got the result I needed."

Duo smiled and wrapped his arms around Heero's neck. "I didn't understand shit of what you two were just discussing, but I can walk again? I'm not going to be paralyzed?"

Heero shook his head and gently placed his own hands on Duo's sides. "It seems like it."

Laughing merrily, Duo grabbed Heero's face and kissed him quickly, but deeply. Heero blushed and nodded nervously towards the doctor, only to have Duo ignore him and kiss him again. But this time, Heero didn't object and kissed him deeply back. Doctor Salvage just smiled and shook his head, leaving the two love birds alone so he could notify the therapists instead.

In the room he left, all the cards were now on the table, all emotions visible and a new future had just started.

---

Clinking his glass softly with a silver spoon, Quatre called for everyone's attention. Smiling as four heads around the table turned to face him, he lifted his glass in a toast. "A toast," he chirped merrily and looked at the other pilots. "For peace and friendship. And that we, for the first time in three years, are gathered all together."

Four glasses was raised into the air and four voices merrily sang out. "For friendship and peace."

For the first time since the first war had started, five hearts were in peace.

A.C. 199; January, L4, Winner Mansion:

Watching as Heero talked with Wufei, Duo smiled and placed his empty crystal glass onto the table. Everything was now right. All five of them, as different as they could be, had now gathered again, smiling and enjoying each others company. Heero was talking about god knew what with Wufei while Trowa and Quatre were talking sweetly with each other in a corner. No real surprise there.

Stretching his arms into the air, Duo adjusted the thick sweater so it didn't ride up before placing his hand on the wheels of his wheelchair and started to maneuver his way towards the balcony. His treatment had started one month ago, and although he was making progress quickly, he was still in need of a wheelchair for the time being. But Duo didn't mind, not when he knew he would walk again as time went on.

Moving himself half way from the edge of the balcony, Duo carefully stood on his legs and paused for a moment. He could feel the muscles stretch in protest at the weight they had to carry, but he gritted his teeth and slowly started to move towards the railing surrounding the balcony.

Half way over, he could feel his right leg buckle a little, but he quickly regained his balance and moved on, one step at a time. One foot was slowly dragged in front of the other, he could feel the pain as he shifted his weight from one leg to the other. When he was almost there, his left leg gave up and collapsed, making Duo fall forward.

Feeling strong arms encircle themselves around his waist, Duo was hoisted back up onto his feet and turned around. Placing his arms around his savior's shoulders, he heard a strict voice sigh. "Duo... What have I told you about that? Don't try and walk when you are alone, you could get seriously injured."

Duo smiled and placed an apologizing kiss on Heero's nose. "Sorry, Heero. But I needed the air and I just wanted to try on my own. I'm not a child, you know."

Heero smiled softly and brushed some loose hair away from Duo's smiling face. "I know that, Duo, but even grown-ups need some help every once in a while."

Duo just smirked and let Heero lead him over to the balcony railing. "Just like you accepted everyone's help back in the war days."

Heero smirked back and supported his back against the railing. "I accepted your help."

Duo cupped Heero's cheek, ignoring that his legs were still slightly protesting against the treatment. "Not right away."

Heero just placed his mouth over Duo's and kissed him tenderly. When he pulled back for air, Duo tightened the grip around Heero's neck and placed his head on Heero's shoulder. "Just a few more weeks," he murmured while toying with a button on Heero's shirt. "Just a little longer, then I'll be able to walk on my own again."

Heero gently rubbed his hand over Duo's back. "Have patience, Duo... Don't rush yourself... Let your body heal at it's own rate."

Duo nodded and smiled happily. "Whatever you say, Heero... I just want to do things on my own again."

Heero chuckled and carefully hugged the braided teen close. He would miss the mornings when he had to help Duo get dressed; all of those moments in the shower and just plain helping Duo with everything he needed. He felt he owed him that much, even though Duo complained that Heero's treatment made him feel like a baby.

"And you will, but all in due time," Heero murmured softly and stroked a hand over Duo's hair.

They stayed outside for a while, just enjoying each other's company and the silence of the night. When Duo started to shiver, Heero gently lifted him up and walked back to the wheelchair. "Let's go inside, Duo. I think the others will start wondering where we are and it wouldn't be nice of us to spend the night out here."

"Says the guy that didn't make a sound for about two years," Duo grinned while making himself comfortable in the chair, using his arms.

Heero just smiled sheepishly before bending down and placing a soft kiss on Duo's lips. "I love you..."

Duo smiled softly back and reached up a hand to stroke Heero's cheek. "And I love you, Captain Spandex..."

Heero grimaced. "I don't even wear those spandex shorts anymore."

Duo grinned and started to maneuver his way back inside. "Doesn't mean I can't use your past against you."

Heero just shook his head and grabbed the handles on the back of the wheelchair and steered Duo back inside. As Heero pushed the door open and steered Duo inside, the wind blew and he could swear he heard a voice in the wind.

_You have found your life and chosen your destiny..._

_The future is yours..._

_Good luck..._

Heero smiled softly as he watched Duo move his way towards Wufei and closed the glass door softly before looking up at the stars. "Thank you..." he mumbled softly. "And I do believe... Thank you for sending me the most beautiful angel heaven has to offer..."

"Heero, who are ya talking to?"

Looking over to the door, Heero spotted Duo trying his best to open the door while still in his wheelchair. Smiling, he walked over and opened it for him. "No one, Duo. I thought you'd rolled over to Wufei?"

"I missed you," the braided teen grinned as Heero took a hold of the handles again and steered him back into the room.

Life was at last looking good for them both. The following month would be hard and faith would have many surprises in store for them, both pleasant and unpleasant ones. But it didn't matter anymore. Now they weren't alone anymore and wouldn't have to face the world on their own. They had given each other wings to fly with and found the soul mate of their dreams.

The future was theirs to shape as they wished.

---

_Author's Notes: Well, what do you think about it? Was it acceptable? Sorry for the abrupt ending, the stupid plot and the horrible written everything... But I still need feedback, I live for feedback. Remember to review. It's a happy thing because then I learn what I can do to get better. -points at the review button- Thankies!_


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